[Goldenloverhrdl]

I have found a golden retriever puppy, who’s able to be rehomed with me tomorrow. The pup will be 8 weeks old. I have 4 kids, call me crazy for even considering a puppy- I know. Want to know what’s even more crazier?….. I just had my last baby 6 weeks ago. My other 3 children are grade school age. They’re 11, 7 & almost 6. But then there is my baby who’s only 6 weeks old and I don’t know if I’m stupid for even considering a pup right now. I don’t know what’s came over me to even want to consider getting a dog. I just feel like our family needs a dog. I just know that I don’t want to get the pup and have major regrets. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t scared or nervous about getting one. One second I’m wanting a dog for the family & then seconds later I’m asking my self if we really need a dog. Is this type of back & forth behavior normal when considering a pup or dog for your family? I’m very partial to golden retrievers & I think they’re the best dogs! I know dogs are a lot of responsibility so I’m not down playing anything. They’re cute but I know they’re a life long commitment.

 

[Megora]

I think it's too soon.... especially since you have reservations.

Rather than take on the extra pressure of a dog who will be a puppy for about 3 months before it's mostly full grown, big, active, etc and so on.... why not take this very special time to be a mom to your youngest and bond and love on that little marshmallow? You have about 8-9 months where that kiddo is going to be in your arms or generally close by as much as possible learning how to talk and be human from you. And you yourself need to de-stress and find "you" time.

I would suggest borrowing very kid safe dogs from friends and family - offer to pet sit and see how you handle a big dog being around the house. It would be good for the kids too learning "dog manners".

 

[nolefan]

No, you should NOT be getting an 8 week old Golden Retriever puppy "For the family" with a 6 week old infant and 3 other kids on your plate already. A family dog with kids means mom and dad will do most all of the work and training. Please spend more time reading through the puppy board and the "What did you DO?!" board for in depth reasons why. A Golden puppy is a huge time commitment to make him the best family dog. Plan on spending the first 1-2 years taking obedience classes and spending an hour or so a day on training and aerobic exercise (leash walks are not enough). If you really do it right, you don't have time for many other projects.

 

[AShepherd1215]

So there’s two angles to consider this from:

1. Should your family get this puppy?
Are you able to commit the time to training a puppy with 4 kids, including a six week old baby? Can you take the puppy outside every hour for potty breaks? Can you dedicate 15-20 minutes several times per day to training and socialization sessions to make sure your dog become a well behaved family pet? Can you dedicate an additional two+ hours to walks and playtime? Are the one-time and reoccurring expenses of a puppy (crate, quality toys, food, vet bills, training classes, pet insurance, etc.) something that you can comfortably afford?
If you aren’t confidently answering yes to all of that, you may want to reconsider. There will always be available puppies (even goldens!) in the future when when the time is right for your family.

2. Should your family get this puppy
This question comes down to health risks of the puppy itself. Is the puppy from an ethical breeder who completed all required health certifications for the parents? Are the puppy’s parents free of any genetic health or temperament concerns? Are there any red flags in the perigee like high rates of cancer?

If the puppy comes from unregistered or untested parents, or you don’t know the puppy’s pedigree, you need to be aware that you are taking a big risk that this puppy could develop debilitating health conditions like hip or elbow, cancers or other genetic illnesses. Getting puppy insurance is a must-have and you should understand the impacts to the dog’s quality of life. A puppy from a breeder who does all required clearances does not eliminate the risk of these condition, but it does reduce the risk.

 

[pawsnpaca]

From the perspective of someone whose most recent of 6 Goldens is now 7 months old, I join with those saying no, you should not get this puppy. I generally discourage anyone who asks me from getting a puppy (or a dog for that matter) until the youngest child they ever plan to have is at least six years old. Puppies are a LOT of work. I was absolutely exhausted for the first four months I had the puppy (and I have NO children - just two other dogs, two cats and a full time job). I think if you have both a puppy and an infant one or both will get short changed (and it’s almost certainly going to be the puppy, though I don’t doubt that everyone in the household will feel the effects of your exhaustion and frustration). I know it’s tempting, but I strongly encourage you to wait. To be honest, I wouldn’t even consider an adult dog until your youngest has started school and can be trusted to follow the rules about how to treat a dog.

 

[GoldenDude]

I get a puppy every 18 months or so. I can not imagine having a puppy and a 6 week old baby.

 

[JoyLev]

Please save your sanity and step away from the puppy. If you are nervous about it and worried about doing something you will regret that says a lot. At one point I had 6 children ages 11 and under and there is NO WAY I could have dealt with the puppy we got last summer had the kids still been those ages. A golden retriever puppy will have a lot of energy and is usually extremely mouthy. They like to play bite, and it hurts because puppy teeth are sharp! They try to eat every **** thing that they can get their mouths on. Teaching them manners and obedience takes a lot of time and consistency among all family members. At their ages, the kids will NOT be able to really help too much with puppy care. If you have a 6 week old you are going to have limited attention to supervise all this, not to mention having to do it all on a (probably) disrupted sleep schedule. Finally, it really sounds like something you wouldn't be doing if this offer of a puppy hadn't fallen into your lap. Anyway, good luck to you if you pursue it, and I hope you don't feel regretful if you take a pass on the puppy.

 

[green branch]

Hi there! I am the one who when I have my plate full to solve the situation add one more thing on top of it. (My husband will often point that out.) I go for it because it is something I desire. Then I have moments of joy and moments of crying from all the load, but it is a journey for me and I feel good at the end.

You got good advices in other posts. Being rational and not overburdening yourself would be a good route too. From my perspective, I can see myself doing something like that, but I am not saying that this is the smartest thing to do.

All the best to your new baby. Good luck!

 

[Ontariodogsitter]

Just a reminder, you are probably feeling slightly hormonal, if you wait a moment sanity will prevail.
Congratulations on the baby, it will take all your time, four children have made you in to a large family wait a bit, before you make it any larger.

 

[3goldens2keep]

You already know the answer! No! We will never have a shortage of good quality puppies, so wait...both your new baby and that puppy will benefit from you waiting...not to mention YOU!

 

[ceegee]

I have found a golden retriever puppy, who’s able to be rehomed with me tomorrow. (...) I’m very partial to golden retrievers & I think they’re the best dogs! I know dogs are a lot of responsibility so I’m not down playing anything. They’re cute but I know they’re a life long commitment.

I'm an experienced dog owner and if I had four young kids including a newborn, I know without a shadow of a doubt that I wouldn't be able to cope with a puppy as well. But I'm not you. Only you know if you can cope or not. We all have different thresholds.

However, just to dispel a myth: golden retrievers puppies look cute but they aren't cute in the broader sense of the term. Goldens were created to be working dogs. That means they are intelligent and energetic. They are also retrievers, which means they are hard-wired to explore the world through their mouths. As puppies, until you teach them the rules of the human world, they are mouthy, they nip and bite, they are excitable and they can be destructive (chewing or eating stuff) if not properly supervised. These traits tend to be made one hundred times worse by busy, noisy environments (e.g. a family with four young children). Golden retrievers are indeed the best dogs, but they aren't born that way. In most cases it takes an enormous amount of human input (training, supervision, structure, exercise, etc., over a period of a couple of years) to turn them into Hallmark family dogs.

In addition to the golden mouthiness, a puppy will pee and defecate in your house for up to four months, until it is fully house-trained. For the first couple of months, it's like a newborn human, in that it has no control whatsoever over the muscles that regulate elimination. It will pee in the house because it simply can't help itself. For the first month or so you'll have to get up in the night to take it outside. You'll need to commit to training and socialization because behaviour that is "cute" in a 10 lb. puppy isn't cute six months later, when that puppy has grown into 60 lbs. of muscle and attitude. If you don't train it properly, it will drag you down the street when you walk it on leash. It will break furniture and lamps in its exuberance. It will run through closed screen doors to get into the back yard. It will knock your children down and potentially hurt them.

Puppies are hard work. You really, really have to want one in order for it to be fun.

Best of luck.

 

[GoldenGirlMama]

Newp. Wait this one out. And btw, the 11, 7 and 6 year olds won't do diddly squat to help.

Signed, mom of 13, 9 and 6 year old humans and 20 month old pup

 

[Sweet Girl]

I'm glad you are taking the time to think about this and get advice. I'm also in the no camp - not right now, anyway. I have not had a newborn human but I cannot imagine having a human baby alongside a baby puppy. The puppy would always get short shrift. Just the house training alone - how can you take a puppy out every hour, sometimes more, sometimes with no notice, with a newborn who might be feeding, might need changing, might just be finally sleeping?

We got an 8-week-old Golden when my sisters and I were 7, 10 and 13. My mother did ALL of the house training and all of the cleaning up after him, etc. It was nothing like the 9-year-old Golden we had cared for over the previous year (that dog, I did a lot with, but she was a well-trained, perfect adult dog - a very different thing).

I think you won't regret waiting a few years.

 

[Megora]

Newp. Wait this one out. And btw, the 11, 7 and 6 year olds won't do diddly squat to help.

Signed, mom of 13, 9 and 6 year old humans and 20 month old pup

Hey - don't dismiss other people's kids.

I very nearly typed a long and very revealing (LOL) story about our first golden.... who was actually my family's second dog. Before I was born, my dad brought home a random mutt mutt dog and both he and my mom FAILED that dog - partly because they had 3 very small kids (baby, 4 year old and 6 year old). They both grew up with dogs, but were not caretakers at all - and it showed with that dog. My oldest sister was 4 years old and basically scarred for life with that. And if we left it to my parents with the golden, they likely would have failed that dog as well. So we kids (3 of us under the age of 10, including me) did ALL the work. The most telling thing or important moment that I remember with that first golden was 6 years later when that dog was dying. I remember turning my head and seeing my dad who sat there hugging our dog and crying for that dog. The second dog and the dogs that followed, we kids still did all the work but it was without the threat of my parents getting rid of it at the drop of a hat.

The OP's kids may be just like the kids in my family as at least two of them are older - who knows.

But because she just had a baby and there is no mention of the other kids and there's already doubts and worries.... probably not a good time.

 

[AllThatGlittersIsGolden]

I would also say "not now." My husband and I have been wanting kids and haven't gotten pregnant yet, so we did recently decide to add another dog to the mix. (My rationale is that even if we get pregnant soon, we'll still have 9 months to train the puppy before a baby arrives.) Our puppy is 13 weeks old, and I can't imagine trying to take care of a newborn baby AND a puppy at the same time (or raising a puppy with morning sickness, so we'll probably wait a little while longer ). Granted, we have 0 kids so in my situation, we would be trying to figure out how to keep a baby alive, as we have 0 experience there. Having older kids, you've gone through that part before and at least know what to expect!

If your situation is such that someone else, such as your spouse/SO, is able to do the majority of the puppy raising, it might could work without adding too much stress. But I would still wait, for all the reasons mentioned throughout this thread. Bond with your baby and enjoy this time without the extra stress of training a puppy.

Also, puppies get into EVERYTHING. When we take our dogs to the homes of our friends who have small children, I keep a constant eye on my dogs, because they WILL get into legos, nerf darts, game pieces, pacifiers, etc. On the other hand, when I've taken dog toys with us to keep my dogs occupied, I have to make sure the babies/toddlers don't put them in their mouths.

 

[Zerpersande]

With a 6 m.o. baby? Absolutely, positively not. My Clooney is 14 months now and he started zooming HARD tonight just out of the blue. And he weighs about 32 kg right now. Nope, not a good idea at all.

 

[Joanne B]

Allow me to respond the way my dearly departed mother would: Your family “needs” a dog right now like you need another hole in your head. Enough said? Stop behaving like an 8 week old puppy- this puppy is not THE last puppy that needs a home RIGHT NOW. There will be others you will “need”. The question remains, does this puppy NEED” your family as much as you think you need him/her? It’s not about what YOU want; what does this pup need, never mind your 3 kids and newborn at any given time. You might “need” a puppy but this pup and your kids need a clear thinking adult. I was waiting for you to say now’s a good time to raise a pup since you’re on maternity leave anyway from your full time job. Oy veh.

 

[Zerpersande]

Allow me to respond the way my dearly departed mother would: Your family “needs” a dog right now like you need another hole in your head.

Actually my mom would’ve said ‘You need a dog right now like a fish needs a bicycle.

Enough said? Stop behaving like an 8 week old puppy

Yeah, it was enough. My mom wouldn’t have added that last bit if she was just giving advice, only if she were pissed off.

 

[Yellow Ball]

No, you should NOT be getting an 8 week old Golden Retriever puppy "For the family" with a 6 week old infant and 3 other kids on your plate already. A family dog with kids means mom and dad will do most all of the work and training. Please spend more time reading through the puppy board and the "What did you DO?!" board for in depth reasons why. A Golden puppy is a huge time commitment to make him the best family dog. Plan on spending the first 1-2 years taking obedience classes and spending an hour or so a day on training and aerobic exercise (leash walks are not enough). If you really do it right, you don't have time for many other projects.

Having had many Golden's-and lots of family..
I would focus on the children and the new baby-adjusting to all the newness of your family life.
The puppy will come when the time is right and you have peace in your heart with your decision.
Puppies are a lot of work and justly so-deserving of full attention and training..not to mention the added expense and care. Wait on puppy..

 

[Megora]

Randomness, but the OP has not responded in a long while. When she posted, it was possible she was going to get the puppy the next day.

That may have happened, or she might have decided against it on her own or based on comments here. But a week has passed...