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My Best Friend is Golden!
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Discussion Starter #1
Leia died a year ago tonight. She was my world, my light, my baby.

All the events of that night just baffle me. She never went out the door without permission, but that night she did - that whole night was odd. - Leia darting out the door, my mom opening the door to take the trash out after midnight, a driver that just had to drive by at that second, and that the driver was driving too fast and out of control. The driver didn't even stop. It didn't even phase the person. Leia knew better, she was trained! I was inside, and by the time I got to her she was gone. She left, and I couldn't even say good bye.

I miss how she use to lay her paw on my hand. I miss how she use to bat her eyes at you when she was happy. I miss how she would lay on her back with her legs in the air; she would just smile. She knew when I hurt, when I needed someone, when I was thinking about her. I can't stop crying. I can't keep myself from looking at the pictures of her on my computer. I miss that red hair and those beautiful brown eyes. I need her, I miss her.

People say that it gets easier with time, but I disagree. Penny, my first golden, died about four years ago of cancer. With Penny, I had time to prepare, and I still cry when I think of her lovely face and what she meant to me, so how can I get over loosing Leia. With LeyLey I had no warning. POW! She was gone! Leia owned my heart and I still haven't gotten it back. Lady (my new little angel) is helping me to get it back though. With each inch we find, she takes command of it. I love Lady, but I still miss Leia. Lady has almost become my therapist, she is probably sick and tired of hearing stories about her older sister Leia. I believe that when a person loves a dog, the collar that belongs to that dog grows around the heart of the owner. Leia's collar was red, Lady's is blue, and my heart is wearing a collar that is on the bluish side of purple. I don't know... I am just really emotional.

I thought that I would share what I am going through to possible help someone who just lost their golden.
 

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Brady Aedan Finch and Wren
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13,388 Posts
What a beautiful girl your Leia was. It does get easier with time, but never easy and you might be holding both anger and guilt for that night.. this makes it harder still.

I am so very sorry for your loss.

Run softly at the bridge Leia.
 

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6,278 Posts
So sorry for your loss of Leia - a beautiful girl. I agree it doesn't get any easier, we do get a little better at coping with the loss, but the pain and hurt of losing them is always there in our hearts.

"They say that time heals,
but that is only partly true,
For if time truly healed
we would forget
And that we will NEVER do"

Run free Leia, sleep softly and keep watch over your family
 

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So sorry to hear about Leia's tragic death. The anniversaries are always tough. I know I will never "get over it". The tears seem to come less often over time.
 

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Nancy
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Anniversaries are hard, I know, just passed the 1 year last month for my Maggie.

Leia is young and healthy playing at Rainbow Bridge.
 

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My Best Friend is Golden!
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168 Posts
Discussion Starter #7
Thank you all for your support. All of you have hearts the size of boulders. God Bless you all.

I know that she is in Heaven, romping and playing. I also know that we will be together some day. I even know that there are huge parts of Leia and Penny within my little Lady. I have spent the entire day, I have been doing something right for once. I have been celebrating Lady then to fret over Leia.

Leia would have been disappointed if she saw me crying about loosing her when I have this new little light in my life to soak up. Leia hated it when I cried, so I did as she would have wanted today. I kept my chin up, thought about Leia often, loved Lady frequently, went on a walk with Lady, and saw the future in Lady's eyes.

However, I will not forget Leia and the things she taught me about being a decent human being. I will not forget Penny and the calm she brought to my life. I will not forget them, because those little doggies made me a better person. This is how I know that dogs have souls and why they do go to heaven.
 

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I think that Leia would be proud of you for the way you are handling loosing her. She would not expect you to be strong all the time. I know this because today is the anniversary of loosing my sweet boy Beau. But unlike you it was a long journey of losing my boy. He slowly lost his strength because of his seizures and the fight just went out of him.
I like to think that he is running and playing with Leia and all the other goldens that have been lost here on the forum from our friends here. May your memories help to heal your pain and your heart. She is still with you now walking on silent paws helping to train your sweet girl Lady. ((((HUGS))))
 

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My Best Friend is Golden!
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168 Posts
Discussion Starter #9
Thank you BeauShel... I'm sorry for your loss. When we lost Penny, she went slowly too. She died of Melanoma, it was horrible seeing her just fade. I, too, hope that your memories will help your heart to heal.
That is a great picture: seeing Beau, Leia, Penny, and all those before and after them, playing and having a happy time. What a wonderful vision. Thank you!
 

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Dog Lover
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42,038 Posts
Leia

I am SO VERY SORRY for your loss of Leia. It is very hard when death comes so unexpectedly.

Glad that you have little Lady to ease your pain and love you.

I love what you wrote about the collar growing around a person's heart-how beautiful.

Rest assured you will see Leia and Penny at the Rainbow Bridge and they are together now.
I'm sure that Penny and Leia are playing with my boy, Snobear, as we speak!!
 

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Missing Selka So Much
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I am so sorry for your loss of Leia and your ongoing grief. I understand. I have been there and now my 11 yr old golden Selka has terminal bone cancer. It is heart breaking and so very painful.Hugs to you.
 

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Chester & Murphy's Mom
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Your red girl Leia was beautiful...your story breaks my heart. I am so glad you have your Lady to help you heal a little each day.
 

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3 goldens
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Time passes, but we never forget these wonderful dogs that we loved so deeply, and that loved us. Theyremain in ourhearts forever.
 

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My Best Friend is Golden!
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168 Posts
Discussion Starter #14
You all are so wonderful. Your hearts overwhelm me! Thank you.

Debles... I'm sorry on the diagnosis. I wish that cancer would go away, I wish it would just disappear. Before Penny's death, my mom purchased a medication (a "Super" supplement) that made Penny live much longer then she would have. She ate it out of my mom's hand; almost like she knew that it made her feel better. She ate it like she knew that we needed her to be with us longer. I will find out the name and let you know in the next few days. I know that it came from Hawaii.

And... yes Goldens definately bring light into this world! Thanks you to you all.
 

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My Best Friend is Golden!
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168 Posts
Discussion Starter #15



This is a two part piece that I did right after her passing last August. It includes the collar around the heart... I don't know why I though of that, I guess Leia through it to me from Heaven. Part one is about her being with me. Part two is her being gone, in a place that I can't get to. I thought that I would share this with you.

God Bless you all!
 
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