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My last post was in the Senior's forum, and it somehow doesn't feel real to be posting here that my best girl has now gone to the Rainbow Bridge. After reading some of the heartbreaking posts here about young goldens and goldens in the prime of their lives suddenly passing on, I feel very fortunate that we had our girl, Lana for almost 15 wonderful years, and that we all had a short time to say goodbye. Still, the pain is difficult to bear. I can only imagine the heartbreak some of you who have lost their beloved goldens at a younger age must feel.

Up to this point, Lana's main health issue was laryngeal paralysis which we were managing, as I wrote in another post. However, yesterday morning Lana collapsed and lost consciousness for a few minutes. Without going into great detail, her breathing was compromised and labored, and although she regained consciousness she was unable to sit up or stand again. Our vet suspected a pulmonary embolism, but we won't know for sure as we opted out of any treatment. Our vet agreed it was her time. We just knew, also.

We're still reeling from our loss--that hole she left is huge, but at the same time we are grateful for many things. We're grateful we were all here with her, and that this happened on a day when our favorite vet was there. We're especially thankful that we weren't travelling to some remote place with her, as we are known to do. If we had to lose her, at least she suffered very little and it was not prolonged.

Having said all that, this really sucks, as my son says. In the course of the day I want to feed her, walk her, talk to her, check on her, and I even think I hear her. It's only been 24 hours. When I am in emotional upheaval I write. I hope it's okay that I am posting a poem here. There'll be revisions later, but all of you here will understand. Thank you to this wonderful group of people for your support and wonderful information.
Lana’s Heart

I thought I was fine
Today
Then remembered
Your heart
That place from where
Your happy dog smiles,
Your forever wagging tail and
Exuberant leaps
at the very thought
Of a flying ball
Began.
Your precious heart,
from where
Your inquisitive eyes
Said you knew exactly
What I said to you
for almost
Fifteen years.
It was your golden, happy heart
That loved your people
And your cats with
The same fierce loyalty,
And gave you your sense of humor
When you carried my underwear
Proudly to our dinner guests,
You, always the happy bearer of presents,
to play..and play...and play...
Your spunky old dog heart
Barked for dinner plate treats,
and made stealing cat food your mission
Only this year

I’m doing fine
Until I remember
Your unstoppable,
Happy heart
that left an indelible stamp
On mine...
Stopped
Yesterday.

Lana
1-11-2000 to 8-22-2014
 

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I'm so very sorry for your loss. Lana sounds like a beautiful girl.
 
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Missing You Buzzy
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I'm so sorry to hear about Lana. Your poem is beautiful and brought tears to my eyes!
 
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I'm very sorry for your loss, but happy you had many good years.
 

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where the tails wag
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What a lovely tribute for your beautiful girl. Your love for her is so clear, I am sorry for your loss

Fly free at the Bridge Lana.
 

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I am so very sorry for the loss of your beautiful girl, sending comforting hugs across to you x
 

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We never, ever have them long enough. May your heart heal, RIP sweet Lana...
 

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Discussion Starter #13
Thank you!

All of your kind sentiments are so appreciated. We've spent a sad day reminiscing about all the wonderful times from puppyhood up to yesterday. She had such a wonderful life, and we have no regrets, except a huge gaping hole where she was. I keep on thinking I see her out of the corner of my eye, and I saved some meat from dinner for her...then...remembered. It will take a while. It is true--it is never long enough. How can it be? Aren't we lucky to have her memory now? We are cherishing that, holding on for awhile...

Thank you again...
Sandy
 

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I am so sorry for your loss. No matter how long we have them, it is never enough. Lana was a beautiful girl. She will live in your heart forever!!! My thoughts are with you as you grieve. RIP sweet Lana.
 

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I am so sorry for your loss. She will always be a part of you and not far from your thoughts.
 
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