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And I disagree. That dog became attached by virtue of your now it’s sole provider. Your it’s health care policy. Your it’s alpha pack leader. It’s depending on everything from you. So yes we disagree totally.
Dependency and attachment are two different things.
Regardless of that, it takes more than one car ride to build a bond with a puppy.
 

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Developing a relationship with a puppy happens through care and training. Those of us that train and compete with our dogs can all attest to that. I was a pet home for a very long time. I am not underestimating the bond a pet home has with their dog, but even that bond is built over time with commitment to care and adapting the dog into the family.

At this point there is nothing to be added to this thread. You either commit to training and building a bond with the dog, or you rehome it. Either way you need to make a decision sooner rather then later. I understand you feel guilt, and think that you have a bond with the dog, what I am saying is that you don't have the kind of bond you would have if you were actively training the dog. If you surrender please contact a GOLDEN RETRIEVER RESCUE. They can properly place the dog in a home that will give it the care it needs. There is no way that a 10 month old with a mouthing issue is suitable for a family looking for a service dog. If the family offering to take him as a service dog doesn't already know that they are not prepared to deal with him anymore then you are.

Best of luck. You came here for advice and you have gotten good advice. The two options are commit to serious training today, or rehome using a Golden Retriever Rescue.
 

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Dependency and attachment are two different things.
Regardless of that, it takes more than one car ride to build a bond with a puppy.
I know my meaning. It’s not what you take it to mean. Attachment is defined as joined, connected bound. In zoological terms: permanently fixed to the substratum. Sessile. I’m not suggesting a car ride mentally binds a dog to a person.
 

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You can be mad all you want. I came on here seeking guidance and help. I didn’t come on here for you to be rude. I did my part when I got him. I researched, I bought books over golden retrievers to prepare myself.
I know the worth of this dog. He deserves nothing by a great life. Not to be kenneled up all day or outside. he deserves love and attention. Like I said above we are considering rehoming but it’s not set and stone. I came to this forum for help not to be ridiculed.
A GRF Member came here hoping for advice and she did get some good advice and maybe she wanted a little understanding too. But really, was it necessary to ridicule, be rude and condescending...

I hope a MOD will close this thread.
 

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Given that you feel you won't have the time to give him the attention he deserves, and leaving him outside is NOT an option, he will only get in trouble left unsupervised - he's a puppy, but even adult dogs get in trouble when they aren't kept safe; the best option for him is to find him a new home where his people will commit the time and attention he deserves.

But, having said that, I don't understand why you think he would interfere with you bonding with your baby. Multitudes of people have more than one child and manage to give them all the time and attention they need. A dog is not a child, but it still holds true, you can give both the time and attention they need and deserve.

I do think you are right to find him a new home if your plan is to NOT continue to give him the attention he needs.
 

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Our first golden puppy arrived about a year and a half before our first child. It sounds like you are being honest as to how you feel about the situation, as you have to be. To the extent it helps...our situation worked out beautifully and another child followed just under three years later. That also went beautifully. The dog was extremely energetic, but I also do quite a bit of obedience training with my goldens. It was MY RESPONSIBILITY to set the dog and child up for success. The children and the dog were taught how to respect one another. They grew to absolutely adore one another. The children and the dog were best of friends and the golden was with us for nearly 14.5 years. It absolutely can work and it can be amazing. Still, I am being honest - if you cannot be committed to making the golden and child successful, you should rehome.

The attached is not a staged photo...this is the kiddos and their golden saying goodbye to daddy, as he leaves for work.
 

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Please be respectful when commenting in this thread-

GRF Board Rules & Registration Agreement | Golden Retriever Dog Forums (goldenretrieverforum.com)

13. GoldenRetrieverForum.com Members will treat individuals with respect. The Golden Retriever Forum relies on its members to self-monitor in terms of rudeness that is just gratuitous. It is one thing to focus passionately on a topic; it is another thing to call someone an offensive name or to be condescending. We hold golden temperaments on high, so let's see our members be friendly to one another as well, even when disagreements occur. You may respectfully disagree with a member’s point of view but do not assault the member or individual personally, or be rude in your responses. Do not use statements that incite conflicts among members. This could include such things as rehashing conflicts from past or closed topics. Do not make abusive, hateful, harassing, or threatening statements. Do not make statements that are untrue, misleading or based on rumors. Discussions of a breeder’s practice are permitted but keep these discussions as you would “reviewing” any other type of business. No personal attacks on the actual individual, who is the breeder, will be permitted. If a thread starts getting heated, take it to a mod, NOT PUBLIC. Those who do not follow this can be warned, suspended or banned.
 

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Our first golden puppy arrived about a year and a half before our first child. It sounds like you are being honest as to how you feel about the situation, as you have to be. To the extent it helps...our situation worked out beautifully and another child followed just under three years later. That also went beautifully. The dog was extremely energetic, but I also do quite a bit of obedience training with my goldens. It was MY RESPONSIBILITY to set the dog and child up for success. The children and the dog were taught how to respect one another. They grew to absolutely adore one another. The children and the dog were best of friends and the golden was with us for nearly 14.5 years. It absolutely can work and it can be amazing. Still, I am being honest - if you cannot be committed to making the golden and child successful, you should rehome.

The attached is not a staged photo...this is the kiddos and their golden saying goodbye to daddy, as he leaves for work.
OMG - this is the sweetest picture I've seen on this forum. <B
 

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Hello, I am a new member. I need help to make a difficult decision.
i am currently 5 months pregnant and have a 10 month old golden retriever names Brixley. He is fully house trained. He is a good pup. However, he can get overly excited when we have people over or when we go to my in laws house. He knows different commands such as, sit, lay down, stay, and paw.
He enjoyed going to daycare when we could afford it. However now, we really do not have a financial stability and with a baby coming we absolutely do not.
But now, I’m struggling with allowing myself to give him too much attention since we are expecting. I want to keep my focus and priority on my baby.
I’ve been trying to be consistent on getting Brixley (dog) ready for a baby. (Im due in March) however my husband and I are unable to see eye to eye on training brixley.
I am more stern and my husband is more lenient.
Brixley can also be very mouthy and tries to bite playfully (this is how puppies play with each other) which I am not comfortable with, knowing that we are going to have a newborn in the house soon. I’ve been working on him to stop being so mouthy. He does well with me and behaves with me.
But it’s a different story when it comes to my husband and his parents. His parents allowing him to mouthy, their excuse is that he is still a puppy.Another thing about Brixley is that when he is around people he loses interests on obeying our commands.
We also do not have a fenced backyard. I thought maybe we could make him into a outside dog however I worry that he might escape or get lonely. I feel bad because he is no longer the center of attention and honestly will continue to not be. We have found a home for him and I’m still in between. I don’t know what to do because I picked him out from his litter, I have raised him the best I can. But like I said my husband and I are unable to figure out the best way or agree on how to prepare him for a baby.
He is very hyperactive and needy, which I know we will not have time for when we do have baby.
Any advice?Is rehoming the best idea?
I think you have made your mind up. I also think he would be better placed in a home that can give him the attention and training he needs. I appreciate you being honest and reaching out.
 

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There's what's right for you and there's what's right for the dog. You're ambivalent. My feeling is that if you're ambivalent now, you'll be even more so after you have the baby. The longer you keep Brixley, the harder it will be on HIM to be re-homed. In his best interests, he needs (especially at the age he is now) to be somewhere else. I say this given the facts you've provided and because you and your husband are not on the same page in terms of training. Do what's right for the dog; it will be right for you, too.

You may feel bad about it initially but once the baby comes I suspect you'll be relieved. Brixley needs attention. He needs to be able to be a puppy. It would be far worse if you kept him, had the baby, and then got rid of him. Do it now. Enjoy your baby.
 

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I only have one thing to add. You seem genuinely worried about caring for a newborn and a young Golden Retriever but I really can't see this as an issue. I understand you may feel overwhelmed over being a new parent but look at all the parents who have newborns and other young children in their homes. Yes having a baby and a young dog is time consuming but is still very doable. What if you had a 2 or 3 year old other child? Would you feel you couldn't have time to care for both a newborn and your existing child? I'm in no way comparing children to puppies but at the same time, it is a time issue and I see no reason you couldn't care for your newborn and still give plenty of love and time to your puppy especially knowing your puppy will be several months older by the birth of your child. Again, there would be no question at all if you had a 2 or 3 year old child and were expecting. You wouldn't give it a thought that you couldn't still care for your existing children and your newborn. And on top of that, you aren't a single parent either so getting your husband to work with you and support you and help with day to day activities should make the decision even less overwhelming and seems to be a better option than giving up your dog. I see this could be a joyful time for you including your puppy with your new addition to your family!
 

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If you'd like to give him a good home I'd love to rake him off your hands. We're responsible people who have had 2 Goldens and looking for another, the older the better. You've probably got another year plus of the craziness after about 2 they start to really calm down.
 

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I got my first golden as a puppy. This was from my mom’s litter. This was 1980. I already had 2 children One was still under a year of age and the other was 2 years old. I also had a mini poodle. And I was a military wife with my husband stationed at Ft Bliss Texas. We had a fenced in back yard as we were living off base. My younger son had medical issues at the time so it was a bit hectic.

Your dog is 10 months old. He is still a teenager and is at the time in his life when training is important. Enroll in a basic obedience program and work with your husband to take the training or help you train the dog.
Even with no backyard, you can still exercise him by taking him on long walks around the neighborhood. Not only is it good for you but it is also stimulating for the dog as well. Now if you can’t walk in the neighborhood due to loose dogs, traffic etc drive down to a park and walk him there. Continue doing this once your baby is born and both you, your baby and your dog will come to enjoy and appreciate these walks.
Golden Retrievers are a great dog to have around babies. They will love and appreciate your new family member as much as you do.
Good luck
Pat
 

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The OP is not replying anymore, which means we have effectively chased her off. I understand the anger and frustration. I feel some of that too. But we don’t help anyone make a decision by criticizing them. I have a senior rescue and a youngish dog from a reputable breeder. I researched the breeder even before I got the rescue but at the time, needed a known temperament to interact with my other dog at the time. The first dog I saw at the rescue seemed perfect. She was relinquished by a young couple with two babies. Well one baby and one toddler. The dog was one. She spent her entire life tethered in a yard, with a doghouse. She was withdrawn and aloof. She didn’t interact well with people and ignored other dogs. Her life was over by age one because all drive and enthusiasm had been pushed out of her by neglect. By the time I made a decision she had been adopted by a family who wanted an easy dog. I worried about her but had to let it go. Large, social dogs should always be indoor dogs.

The OP has probably made a decision but if not, I would ask how attached she really is to the dog. If she can’t imagine living without her dog, then she should do anything she can to keep him. If not, rehome through a reputable rescue. They will evaluate him for trainability and for any bad habits that might need addressing. They may have a trainer work with the dog, then they will find a good home for that particular dog. There is nothing wrong with giving up a dog that is too much for an owner. I never have, never would, but everyone should have that option if they need it, without judgment or criticism.
 

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Hello, I am a new member. I need help to make a difficult decision.
i am currently 5 months pregnant and have a 10 month old golden retriever names Brixley. He is fully house trained. He is a good pup. However, he can get overly excited when we have people over or when we go to my in laws house. He knows different commands such as, sit, lay down, stay, and paw.
He enjoyed going to daycare when we could afford it. However now, we really do not have a financial stability and with a baby coming we absolutely do not.
But now, I’m struggling with allowing myself to give him too much attention since we are expecting. I want to keep my focus and priority on my baby.
I’ve been trying to be consistent on getting Brixley (dog) ready for a baby. (Im due in March) however my husband and I are unable to see eye to eye on training brixley.
I am more stern and my husband is more lenient.
Brixley can also be very mouthy and tries to bite playfully (this is how puppies play with each other) which I am not comfortable with, knowing that we are going to have a newborn in the house soon. I’ve been working on him to stop being so mouthy. He does well with me and behaves with me.
But it’s a different story when it comes to my husband and his parents. His parents allowing him to mouthy, their excuse is that he is still a puppy.Another thing about Brixley is that when he is around people he loses interests on obeying our commands.
We also do not have a fenced backyard. I thought maybe we could make him into a outside dog however I worry that he might escape or get lonely. I feel bad because he is no longer the center of attention and honestly will continue to not be. We have found a home for him and I’m still in between. I don’t know what to do because I picked him out from his litter, I have raised him the best I can. But like I said my husband and I are unable to figure out the best way or agree on how to prepare him for a baby.
He is very hyperactive and needy, which I know we will not have time for when we do have baby.
Any advice?Is rehoming the best idea?
If it's a better choice for Brixley definitely let him go there. Your baby comes first and you will be exhausted if not already. Do what is best for your pup. Wish you well!!
P.S. my golden is 1 year 2 months old. He gets ALL of my attention as I'm older and single. My child is 28!! These dogs are happiest with attention and love. 🤗
 

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It is apparent from your first post that you have given this a lot of soul-searching thought, and you know what is best for Brixley. Unexpected things happen in life forcing people to change course. I have been involved in Golden Retriever rescue for over 15 years and have seen how well young dogs transition to a new home. Think about contacting a Golden rescue and placing Brixley with them.

The Golden Retriever Club of America used to have a list of rescues but I cannot find it on their website. Here is a link from another site that lists rescues by state:


Or you could google "golden retriever rescues near me."

I wish you the very best, and please do not let some of the comments here upset you.
 

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Hello, I am a new member. I need help to make a difficult decision.
i am currently 5 months pregnant and have a 10 month old golden retriever names Brixley. He is fully house trained. He is a good pup. However, he can get overly excited when we have people over or when we go to my in laws house. He knows different commands such as, sit, lay down, stay, and paw.
He enjoyed going to daycare when we could afford it. However now, we really do not have a financial stability and with a baby coming we absolutely do not.
But now, I’m struggling with allowing myself to give him too much attention since we are expecting. I want to keep my focus and priority on my baby.
I’ve been trying to be consistent on getting Brixley (dog) ready for a baby. (Im due in March) however my husband and I are unable to see eye to eye on training brixley.
I am more stern and my husband is more lenient.
Brixley can also be very mouthy and tries to bite playfully (this is how puppies play with each other) which I am not comfortable with, knowing that we are going to have a newborn in the house soon. I’ve been working on him to stop being so mouthy. He does well with me and behaves with me.
But it’s a different story when it comes to my husband and his parents. His parents allowing him to mouthy, their excuse is that he is still a puppy.Another thing about Brixley is that when he is around people he loses interests on obeying our commands.
We also do not have a fenced backyard. I thought maybe we could make him into a outside dog however I worry that he might escape or get lonely. I feel bad because he is no longer the center of attention and honestly will continue to not be. We have found a home for him and I’m still in between. I don’t know what to do because I picked him out from his litter, I have raised him the best I can. But like I said my husband and I are unable to figure out the best way or agree on how to prepare him for a baby.
He is very hyperactive and needy, which I know we will not have time for when we do have baby.
Any advice?Is rehoming the best idea?
How difficult this must be for you. I have had Golden Retrievers for 40 years and I am currently wait listed with 2 breeders, if you and your husband have different theories on training and your in-laws as well re home him. It will be difficult for you but it’s what is best for him. Choose someone who has experience with this breed and is not living close by or a relative. My reasoning is you will always think of him as yours, let yourself give him this gift. Your priorities have changed and it’s what is best. Wishing you and him the very best.
 
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