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We lost our loved 10 yr 10 month old Golden Riley on June 6th. He had some down days but the vet keep saying that he looked good...story for another thread. He was happy and jumping around when I had to leave home to help an elderly relative and died in his sleep at home while being watched by our in house dog baby sitter and walker. She has watched the dogs for 4 yrs and is like family. We are heart broken.

My other dog Benjamin is about 6 yrs and been with Riley since he was 8 wks they are insperable. They always fought for attention, we have no kids so they got lots.

Benjamin now will not walk with the walker and I have been working at home to keep him company but he is not even staying near me, normally two dogs right next to me. He mostly sits in a corner wimpering it is heart breaking. Is this greaving? I took him to the vet he passed all blood test, urinalysis and had X-Rays too the works all they found was a cracked pre moler that we have a dentist appointment to address.

Need help my heart is total broken at the loss of Riley and now Benjamin's sadness. I am just completely destroyed.
 

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I'm so sorry about Riley. Your dog probably is grieving. I had three dogs, and one died in August, then one died in February. My last remaining dog was really put out. She was sad. She's the type, anyway, that can't bear to be alone.

When we were sufficiently over our loss, we got a new dog, our first golden. He aggravates the crap out of my old dog but she still likes his company.

I think your dog will begin to feel a bit better, but if he's like mine, he will eventually need a new dog friend to completely get over it.
 

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I too am sorry for your loss and for little Benjamin. Does he have any neighbourhood doggy friends he can spend some time with to see if that picks him up a little?
 

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I am so sorry for your loss!! I know how your heart must hurt, been thru it several times. Three yrs ago my Tyler died suddenly, our other boy, Toby seemed depressed. We took him everywhere with us to pull him out of it. Four months later I got another golden boy. Toby does'nt really act thrilled, but I do believe he loves the company when we're not home. My opinion, and only mine, is not to wait too long. Your doggie is still young, would probably adapt well with another at his age. But everyone is different, I love having 2 in the house.
 

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It sounds like grieving to me.

I had two sisters from the same litter, When one passed away, the other became really withdrawn, didn't want to play, refused to eat (I had to basically force feed her), cried a lot and moped around. It was gut wrenching. We weren't ready to get another dog so we brought her to my brothers house down the street and spent every minute walking and playing with them together, it seemed to really help her being around another dog during that time

I am so sorry for your families loss. I hope Benjamin finds a way to cope.
 

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Thank you all so much. I am bringing Benjamin to my neighbors house as much as I can to play with their 9 yr old Golden who basically drives him crazy, mounts him licks his ears and just goes crazy, poor Benjamin but when it came time to leave he layed down in the street and refused to go home, so I guess he liked the company? Better abused then no doggie friend? He will also lay down in the street in protest unless he can visit every dog that walks by even if they want to bite him, does not care all dog attention is good attention to him. We are hoping that he snaps out of it because we want to bring him some places that were more difficult packing up 2 dogs like higher end hotels that we brought his brother to prior to having two dogs.
Riley was the pack leader and as much as Benjamin challenged him for it I don't think he wants the job. Riley always walked the dog walker:) and Benjamin went along for the ride so now he refuses to go. They had two very different personalities, Riley was essentially a "Marley" he was a very stubborn high personality dog. That is why we are all so lost I guess, he ruled all of us.. we planned weekends around where he would want to go. Benjamin was always layed back Riley was all personality he was a human in dog fur.
My husband is resistant to getting another dog right now because he was so torn up about Riley and because he watched me cry for weeks,, still do, burst out in tears over dinner last night after spending the whole day with Benjamin crying who could not be consoled. I tried fetch, cuddling etc... no reaction. Now I am worried about him.
We will likely get a second dog sometime it is just not time yet maybe 6 months.
 

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Heartfelt hugs and yes, he is grieving

I am so sorry about the loss of your Riley. My heart is bleeding with you, I just lost my Brody two weeks ago. When Brody was 4 we lost Morgan, our yellow lab. She taught Brody so much when we brought him home from the humane league at 10 months. We also had a Bichon at that time, but Brody only laid on his bed, did not eat for a few days and broke my heart because he barely wanted to go for walks and it was close to a month before he got his spirit back then just 4 months after we lost Morgan, we lost Belle, our Bichon. 2008 was an AWFUL year.
I agree with those who wrote about getting him out with other dogs. My daughter adopted a dog who we kept part time a few months after losing Brody and it helped him a lot. He then found a "neighbor" who he loved and it made a difference.
They do grieve, I am seeing it with his cat who I got 9 months after we lost Morgan so he would not be alone while I worked. She is clearly mourning him with me and I do believe they are no different than us.
Just be sure he is drinking and eating every few days. My vet had me closely monitoring his food intake because he was so sad and literally only got off his bed they shared to go out for almost the first week.
Hugs help and they just need time as we do for the pain and emptiness to ease. Till he went to Rainbow bridge he still got excited to see a light colored yellow lab.
Hugs to all of you.
 

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I'm very sorry for your loss. I think that Benjamin's "grieving" is a normal response to a change in his environment that he doesn't understand. I don't think dogs understand death in the way that we do.
They are, on the other hand, very astute at sensing the emotional state of their owners and reacting to it.
There are many good articles on helping your dog rebound after losing his playmate.

Here are a few:

Do Dogs Grieve? Mourn the Loss of a Loved One

The Dog Trainer : Do Dogs Grieve When Another Dog Dies? :: Quick and Dirty Tips ™
 

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Losing them is ever so hard and I ache for you, as you wrestle with your own grief and that of your Benjamin.

This definitely sounds like grief and loneliness. Is it possible to get him to doggy day care a couple of times per week? That would give him an opportunity to play and feel less abandoned.

Good luck and please keep us posted.
 

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Kelly came home to us at 8 weeks, Casey was 4 years. He passed at the age of 13. Kelly stayed under the kitchen table for two solid weeks. We did everything we could to help her but it was just time that was needed. They suffer loss just as we do. I'm sorry for your loss!
 

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I'm sorry for your sudden loss of Riley. My golden died all of a sudden also. I was in shock for a few days. We couldn't bare an empty house. So we went out and got another golden just three days later. Probably way to early. But as the weeks went by it helped us grieve Ginger dying with no warning. It's probably wise to take it slow and add another dog when your both ready. I'm sure Benjamin will need some time also. I've never dealt with a grieving dog before. But getting him out of the house and around other dogs as much as possible is probably the best thing to do.
 

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I agree with Goldylover2 in terms of Taking it slow and Leting time take its course. This is just my experience but when we lost our dog and "Lady" found herself on her own I jumped in too quickly by getting another dog full time at home. With hindsight I did not think it through rationally and we should have spent more time letting Lady "grieve", spending as much time with her as possible, but also thinking through what type and age of new dog would be best for us all. I ended up with a puppy who drove Lady mad. Even after a few years she resented him. If i relived the situation I would have taken a quiet rescue dog around the same age. And your boy is grieving.. but so are you. So go easy on yourself.
 

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I lost my 9 year old male on June 18th. He's been with a female we rescued for over 8 years and she seems lost without him and won't leave our deck to go potty without someone standing out there with her. She follows my wife around all the time and won't be left alone now, but to be honest, she seemed to change once he got sick. I'm convinced she knew he was ill and has been down ever since then.
 

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So sad! When I was young, Banjo passed away and his lifelong companion Tootsie went out and lay out by his grave in the goldenrod for hours for about three months and was obviously grieving. Later, when my golden Raleigh died, his lifelong companion Acadia searched the house for him and seemed so lost- it broke my heart I kept trying to explain to her. . .:) i think the passage of time will help him adjust, and doing some special trips and training with Benjamin. I am so sorry for your loss of Riley.





We lost our loved 10 yr 10 month old Golden Riley on June 6th. He had some down days but the vet keep saying that he looked good...story for another thread. He was happy and jumping around when I had to leave home to help an elderly relative and died in his sleep at home while being watched by our in house dog baby sitter and walker. She has watched the dogs for 4 yrs and is like family. We are heart broken.

My other dog Benjamin is about 6 yrs and been with Riley since he was 8 wks they are insperable. They always fought for attention, we have no kids so they got lots.

Benjamin now will not walk with the walker and I have been working at home to keep him company but he is not even staying near me, normally two dogs right next to me. He mostly sits in a corner wimpering it is heart breaking. Is this greaving? I took him to the vet he passed all blood test, urinalysis and had X-Rays too the works all they found was a cracked pre moler that we have a dentist appointment to address.

Need help my heart is total broken at the loss of Riley and now Benjamin's sadness. I am just completely destroyed.
 
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I'm so sorry for your loss of Riley.

I do believe our dogs grieve the loss of their buddies almost as much as we do.
I saw it with my girl when my Bridge boy passed.

My thoughts are with you all.
 

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I'm so sorry about the loss of your Riley. It sounds like you are ALL grieving - including poor Benjamin. :( That would just break my heart to see, too.

What about getting him a kitten if you're not up for another dog right now? Maybe he needs something to sort of take under his wing and care for?

I hope your heart starts to heal soon. It's the hardest thing about loving a dog.
 
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Discussion Starter #17
I am so sorry to hear about Brody RIP. He can play with Riley at the Rainbow Bridge Riley is our first dog to pass and needs friends.

On that note Riley and Benjamin used to drag my dog walker up a long hill every day to check on a really old female golden that would coming running out to bark wildly at them. Riley even wanted to do the hill on slow days. A few weeks ago I walked by with Benjamin and she was laying in the driveway looking really really tired like Riley looked when he had a few bad days now we don't see her anymore. We still get taken by Benjamin every day to look for that dog I am hoping that she is inside but I don't think so. How odd would it be if they died a few weeks apart? Hope he goes to see her at the bridge.

Benjamin is doing a bit better...sometimes... well first off he is petrified of fireworks so scared to death right now so more clingy.

I have taken to playing dog. YES playing dog... I roll down the hill with dog toys and wrestle with him the way that his brother did and he just lights up for a while. If you saw this you'd really get a laugh my husband thinks that I am nuts. Might actually be good play therapy for me:)

It’s been really to hot here to walk during the day or play with other dogs. It should cool down next week so we will try visiting the neighbor again. Hopefully in time he will get happier he is always had Riley since 8 wks, Riley was about 5 at the time we got Benjamin.

Thank you everyone for your help
 

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So sorry

SO VERY sorry to hear about Riley. I'm sure Benjamin is grieving. Pay him extra attention, including brushing him if he likes it. We've had two dogs now forever, and when we lose one, we always adopt another, as much for our other dog as for us.
 
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