Bonding - Golden Retrievers : Golden Retriever Dog Forums
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post #1 of 11 (permalink) Old 07-18-2019, 10:44 AM Thread Starter
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Bonding

Hi! I’m new to the group, I have a just turned 1yr Old Golden Ret we named Gypsy, I really wanted her, I love how Goldens are so affectionate and cuddly! my husband didn’t want to get another dog, but gave in, he really loves her now! we both love her, I’m the one who named her she was in my lap on the way home from the breeder, I feed her, I took her to puppy obedience classes, I take her for walks, and now she could care less if I’m in the room, when I get up to leave she just lays there but if my husband leaves she can’t get up fast enough, she doesn’t even want to cuddle with me, talk about getting a complex, I’m actually feeling a bit jealous, is this normal will she ever bond with me? I’m ready to look for another one for my own, but that one would probably Bond with my husband too, I don’t know what I did wrong.. sometimes it feels like I don’t even have a dog because I hardly see her when my husband is home unless we’re in the same room! Has this happened to anyone else? and is there hope that she may become the cuddler I wanted? 😕
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post #2 of 11 (permalink) Old 07-18-2019, 10:56 AM
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Amber turned 2 in March. She has never been a cuddler with either my wife or myself. Bonding does take a while so I wouldn't worry about it. We've both had times where we felt as you do. These days amber will come to me and after a couple of minutes of attention she will lay right in front of me. She doesn't do that with my wife much but she does follow her around and will sit herself right in the middle of the kitchen when my wife is cooking. Your pup is still young so you have lots of time to connect.
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post #3 of 11 (permalink) Old 07-18-2019, 04:26 PM
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I think over all the years of us having dogs, my husband was always the "fun" one. I think it has to do with the fact I was the one who did the feeding, training, trips to the vets. Sometimes a few of these things are not always the favorite thing to do in their little minds. They just got used to me doing all these things and I was around them more than my husband. I also think it is something that comes as they age. It is hard not to take it personally - especially when you see them going nuts because Dad just got home from work. I would suggest taking a few more obedience classes, now that she is older. Perhaps a rally or agility class. Particularly with rally and agility - these are very interactive classes and you really get to "talk" with your dog and in the meantime they are learning and spending time with you doing something fun.
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post #4 of 11 (permalink) Old 07-18-2019, 09:03 PM
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Second above idea of takin classes and focus on obedience but also take a fun one or look for a retrievin club. You would be out buildin a relationsip. (sorry my keyboard is on its last le....) It takes more time wit some tan wit oters. DO not quit.


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post #5 of 11 (permalink) Old 07-18-2019, 09:52 PM
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Our cat is the same way. She only loves my husband and barely tolerates me even though I'm the one who feeds her etc. So I was really looking forward to getting a Golden and finally getting to bond but Luna wasn't a cuddler either so I trained her w/ treats to get up on the couch w/ me and look cute (lay her head on my stomach and stare at me) and give me kisses or nose touches. After awhile of doing this she now forgets why she's there and just falls asleep on me. And now that she knows how comfortable that is she just gets up on the couch and falls asleep without treats. My husband's jealous. It's great. Don't be afraid to buy her love with treats to start.

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post #6 of 11 (permalink) Old 07-19-2019, 08:43 PM Thread Starter
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Thanks everyone! l like some of the ideas, I do think I may get her back in some obedience classes! Hopefully as she gets older our bond will strengthen! 😊
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post #7 of 11 (permalink) Old 07-20-2019, 03:23 PM
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Amber bonded with me as a puppy. My wife was upset with her for destroying her shoes, sofa arm covers, and one of my hearing aids. Then, when Amber was six, my wife became wheelchair/oxygen dependent. Amber became her protector. Whenever Sharyl called my name, Amber came to me and insisted I go to her. When Sharyl passed away, Amber slept by the side of her bed for weeks. She is over it now and sleeps beside my chair or bed and is always at the door when I come home. But she sensed that Sharyl needed her more than I did during that two-year period.
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post #8 of 11 (permalink) Old 07-21-2019, 02:42 AM
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Harrym, so sorry for your loss. It looks like you have a special girl there! Isnít it amazing how they can sense things? Itís a gift to have them in our lives. My pup Aidan loves everyone who gives him attention, but he will follow me or my husband everywhere we go. Some days I think he likes me more and sometimes he seems he likes my hubby more... maybe itís an equal 50/50 thing!
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post #9 of 11 (permalink) Old 07-23-2019, 10:54 AM
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A female/male thing. But trust me. She still loves you and will certainly look to you as her master and protector especially when he is not around. Of course there is always divorce. Lmao. 😂😂
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post #10 of 11 (permalink) Old 07-30-2019, 08:04 PM
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HA!!! I could have written the original post. Hubby said one dog (jack russell) was enough and didn't want another dog. He has a sweet spot for our daughters and when they said they wanted a golden, he caved and drove 2.5 hours to pick up Luna with us in tow.

I am a stay at home mom since my youngest was born. So I am the one who walks the dogs, feeds, bathes, grooms, apply/feed medicine, etc. He is the one who overfeeds them with treats, etc.

He can pick either one up and put them in his lap where they fall asleep. If I (or anyone else) tried, they would growl, yes growl! When he returns from business trips, they literally lose their minds and run around the house like it's on fire.
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