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Old 01-16-2013, 12:47 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by goldensrbest View Post
So sorry, i know what your talking about, my husband has stage 4 cancer,it also has spread, two different types of chemo,it did not help.
I'm so sorry!!!! I can't even imagine how difficult this is for you and your husband!!!

My dad's is stage IV as well and terminal. He's been on more drugs then I can remember. I'm having trouble coping with this. I find there are days that I mourn and grieve as if he's already gone. My BFF told me, its s coping mechanism for those dealing with long term illnesses and terminal diseases.

I want to hang on to him with every fiber in my being, but i don't want him to suffer. On Thanksgiving, it was obvious that he's tired of being here. Tired of the fight. I think a lot of it, he's hanging on for our sake, which is wrong for us to expect. We've had a bumpy past and I've only reconnected with him 10 years ago, my brother took longer to get over his anger. What I wouldn't give to have the missing 16 years back.


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Old 01-16-2013, 12:50 PM
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love you spencer, forever

 
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I remember when my dad got cancer,in 1990, he was my first really big loss, it was tough, tough on my mom to , back then ,he was given no hope, no chemo,no drugs at all, on pain meds, he was 61 when he passed,it was lung cancer. I got so angry, that he had smoked, did not stop, angry at him, angry at the industry,that made those horrible things.
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Old 01-16-2013, 12:52 PM
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love you spencer, forever

 
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Don't beat yourself up,honestly, spend this time with him,if you can, if not call him every day.
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Old 01-16-2013, 01:13 PM
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Don't let words go unspoken. That's my best advice.
{{{Hugs}}}
Thanks! I've never minced words with him. When we reconnected, i laid everything on the table. My dad is a very gruff person. He doesn't express his emotions well. Whenever i tell him i love him, he would say "roger that". Now he tells me he loves me.


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Old 01-16-2013, 01:40 PM
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I'm so sorry that your family is walking this path. My prayers for all of you. If it indeed is nearing the end, hospice is a wonderful resource not only for your dad, but for all the family too. They are truly angels in caring for and helping the family face saying goodbye. I hope that whatever happens, you all are at peace and like was said above, that nothing goes unsaid (including that it's ok to go, that the family will be ok... many do hang on for family members and getting that last "ok" eases their transition. My sister and I said that to my mom in her last day. She was unresponsive but since they say hearing is the last sense to go, I hope she knew.)
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Old 01-16-2013, 01:45 PM
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I'm so sorry you are going through this. I'll be thinking of you, your family and your father.
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Old 01-16-2013, 05:24 PM
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Brave

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I am so very sorry that your Dad and your family is going through awful cancer.
Spend time with him if you can visit him, if not, spend lots of time with him on the phone, writing him, telling him how much he means to you!
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Old 01-20-2013, 02:05 PM
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Keeping your Dad and you in my prayers!!
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Old 01-20-2013, 03:03 PM
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THinking of you and praying for strength for your dad, you and your family.
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Old 01-20-2013, 04:07 PM
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So sorry to read this but happy to hear that you reconnected with your Dad a while ago. Hoping that the radiation does some good. People sometimes do just get tired of being sick every day when there is no positive outcome and are often ready to give up the fight long before their families are ready to accept this. Your Dad is lucky to have your acceptance of his decisions.
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