Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Courtice, Ontario Canada
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Thanked 5 Times in 2 Posts
I just completed the message below and tho I tried my best to share how awesome a time I had, it disintegrates quickly. PLEASE THINK CAREFULLY BEFORE YOU READ IT. I MEAN YOU NO[/COLOR] HARM AND IT MAY HIT TOO CLOSE TO HOME.
HEllo to all!
Molson and I had a great Christmas and I was so exhausted from it all I was glad it was over. I took down the decorations and Molson helped but taking his position sprawled out strategically under my feet but I managed to work around him like they insist we do. We usually head out for my aunts on Boxing Day but I spared him the long car ride this year and the kids came and stayed. He doesn't eat when I'm gone but I doubted hie'd stick to his ideals by refusing to eat if I made him a Duck, spinach, pumpkin and green beans in the crock! I was right, the duck won. I thought I'd wait till the morning to leave and make sure he ate. I'm so thankful I did because if I'd left earlier I'd have missed the Golden Retrievers Observed Holiday! For some strange reason I woke up about 2:45 and he was still snoring away beside me and i happened to notice out the window it was our first snowfall of the year! He wakes me up at 3:00 every morning by resting hos paw gently on my arm and holding it there while panting in my face. I gave up about 2 yrs ago resisting his 3am ritual but when I realized how awesome it was at that time of night - just us in the world I knew he was right. I have to admit though, i sure enjoy turning the tables on him when I wake up first. The best day in life w a retriever has got to be the first snow though don't you agree? So i woke up and stepped quietly over the big clown and managed to get my coat hat and boots on and i laid my arm on his upper arm but happy as he laid his head head back down pretending he was in no hurry but the rythmic thum thump thump of their tails give them away. I hammed it up and he knew something was up but sniffing my pockets and scanning the floor so sure I had treats. I opened the front door and went out first so i wouldnt miss the look on his face and he couldnt believe his eyes. He nearly knocked me over going down the stairs and if you think that the puppy he was, is gone.... You're going to see that pup is still there. You might get the old-man version now but you'll see it i promise. We had so much fun thought we stop every few steps, to rest. He was bouncing and hopping ahead of me and kept looking behind to make sure he wasnt getting too far ahead. If he could speak words he wouldn't have been able to finish one sentence. OMG its the one day each year he hopes you'll share w him so dont miss it. We made snow angels and i was getting cold and we gave in to our age and decided to go in but as i got behind him to guilde his wobbly rear end up the steps, he changed his mind and stepped up on the lawn and laid down not on his side and i was chattering away like usual when I noticed he was staring at me. He NEVER stares but i started to get concerned. I was sitting on the step 3 feet in front of hom and he wouldnt stop the stare. So I moved in close to make sure he was ok and he seemed fine. So I knew he had something important on his mind and it hit me so hard, i told him to stop thinking whatever it was and he got up and went in, had cheetos and went back to sleep. I got up in the morning and he was just fine so I thought it was ok if I left but it wasnt fine and i had conviced myself as usual I was over- reacting.
My Kids called me after having spent the whole day, doing yard work while he enjoyed the snow and they all 3 came in and had dinner (he ate!) and then laid on his side and he was peeing and he didn't care and that's not like him. so he laid on the kitchen floor and he took a big breath, lifted his Head - looked at the kids he'd grown up with and laid his head back down and let out his breath and he was gone.
But for him I'm so happy he lived feeling good it was like he was programmed like my cell phone, everything fine then the next second is up.
My arms are so empty.
I thought I was better prepared but I wasn't quite ready yet. I dont know what to do to make it stop. I swear ive come close to calling 9-1-1 cuz i feel like i'm dying and maybe they can help me - maybe send a cute cop haha- but i know theres nothing can cure this. My brain is even playing horrible tricks on me, i just needed a little more time. I tried very hard to make this note positive and to share how fantastic our last hours were together, and they were! Probably the best day we ever had.
In the 16 years, 1 month and 2 days we had.
If u look for the Golden's holiday each year you'll have gifts so valuable you have no idea.
Thanks for listening. I've probably ruined your day. Better scoot back up to the top and warn u. I'm sad enough for all of us!