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Old 12-30-2012, 09:15 AM
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Lost the Light of my Life ..

Mattie 7/3/2002 - 12/7/2012 The light of my life and center of my world
Never thought I'd be grieving and in need of support again so soon .. how quickly 10 1/2 years have gone.. heartbroken doesn't begin to describe, this is a hurt there are no words for.. Dec 7, I lost my precious baby girl Mattie to cancer (vet said hemangiosarcoma, but could not be 100% sure w/o invasive operation which after much prayer we decided not to put her thru).. we didn't know until about 3-4 weeks earlier that she was even sick .. I'm here because there are moments I don't know if I can get thru this .. I don't have a lot of family/friend support.. none that truly understand what I'm going thru like I know the golden Moms here do .. When I lost my Sheeba girl in 2002, my 1st golden baby, the members on ivillage got me thru, and when I found this board I thought some of the member names looked familiar, and I was led to reach out for help once again .. there's so much I want to say about Mattie, but I'm still trying to put words on a gratitude card to all the kind people at my vet's office, and still can't even do that .. I think that putting it in words just makes it too real, too soon .. Mattie was the most kind gentle spirit, and allowed us to experience a little bit of Heaven here on earth ... prayers of comfort for all those grieving this morning... sheebamattiemom
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Old 12-30-2012, 09:34 AM
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So sorry you lost your girl, they bring so much love to our lives, and when they pass, such a empty sad feeling.
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Old 12-30-2012, 09:37 AM
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I'm so very sorry for your loss of Mattie. I agree, the pain, loss, and emptiness you feel is unbearable and there are no words really to describe how you feel.

There are too many of us who know what you're going through, I am one of them. I lost my boy almost 2 years ago at the age of 15.5. We were devastated and miss him everyday.

Time will help ease your pain, each day will get a littler easier, although you will always miss them. I hope the day will come where you will be able to find peace in knowing that Mattie is at the Rainbow Bridge with so many of our Goldens. I find comfort in knowing that my boy is no longer in pain, he is running free, enjoying life like he once did as a pup, and waiting for me to join him.

My heart goes out to you.

Godspeed sweet Mattie
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Old 12-30-2012, 09:39 AM
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I am so very sorry about your loss. It is such a hard thing when we lose our beloved pets. I still cry after 6 months of Allie being gone. I am alone and she was my world. My life still is very empty without my girl. Just be very kind to yourself and take it one day at a time. Do you have another dog? I still had my Bessy so that helped some. It was pretty hard on her too. I am sending hugs and prayers. I do know and feel your pain. I couldn't eat or sleep or do anything. Then my vet talked to me and told me Allie wouldn't want me to do that to myself because she loved me so much. She helped me so much to get through the pain. Take care of yourself.
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Old 12-30-2012, 10:15 AM
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I am so sorry for your loss and I well know the pain you are feeling. We lost our 15 year old eskie this past summer and it is such a difficult time. Sending hugs your way.
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Old 12-30-2012, 10:16 AM
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I am so very sorry.
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Old 12-30-2012, 10:23 AM
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Oh, I am sorry and I know that feeling all too well, having lost 3 goldens and now caring for a golden fighting cancer. I think writing helps and even though it brings it all to the front again, at least for me I've always needed to do that. There are excellent threads on this forum and maybe you can begin a thread to put your thoughts into.
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Old 12-30-2012, 10:25 AM
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Mattie

My heart goes out to you! Hemangiosarcoma is evil.
I know Mattie is romping with my Smooch and Snobear.
I added her to the 2012 Golden Ret. Rainbow Bridge list.
http://www.goldenretrieverforum.com/...ml#post1872802 (GRF Goldens that passed in 2012 - The list)
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Tucker, Tonka, and Karen

SNOBEAR at the Bridge
Dec. 23, 1999-March 27, 2010


SMOOCH at the Bridge.
Feb. 14, 1999-Dec. 7, 2010
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Old 12-30-2012, 12:55 PM
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Thank you..

Heartfelt thanks to each one of you who cares and responded so quickly to my cry for help .. Mattie (and Sheeba) were the closest loves I will have to a non-furbaby child, as we do not have children .. and so they both were the center of my life. My heart had forgotten the pain and sadness I went thru when I lost Sheeba, the love of Mattie had crowded out those sad memories I guess, but now I remember all too well .. I'm sorry if I ramble, but I know you'all understand. I think I'm slowly moving into the guilt phase where I always get stuck with any of my grief.. I can barely stand to be at home now, it's just so lonesome .. I have been retired a couple of years, in hopes to have a lot of time to spend with Mattie, and I am very thankful for those 2 extra years, and during this time we had grown even closer if that was even possible.. Oh how she loved me and I couldn't save her ... this pic was taken Nov 17 ..u can see what a sweetheart .. I don't know how to stop crying... Thank you for caring... sheebamattiemom
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Old 12-30-2012, 12:58 PM
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I am so sorry that you are having to go through this pain. We all understand. I too never had children so my furbabies have been my kids. She is beautiful and I know she is still watching over you. It is one minute at a time right now.
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