Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Upstate NY
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Thanked 45 Times in 24 Posts
I'm thanking you in your own post for your words to me in my thread on my loss of my dog Jasper more than 12 months ago. I know you are where I was a year ago, and it is a difficult journey, to say the least. You're in the shock/misery stage where getting through the days is hard. I'm guessing that you have waves of intense grief the way I did then; during that time the longing for my dog was so strong that I would literally beg him to let me know he was out there somewhere, somehow. And I'm not a terribly religious person!
I wish I could be there and sit and talk to one another and offer understanding and comfort.
I know I wanted to think about a new puppy almost reflexively, as a sort of shelter from the intense pain. My husband was not ready, so we did not; still, I feel that I was in no way thinking I could replace him--that would be impossible--I just wanted to be able to put my cheek against a furry ruff, to experience all things dogly. I think this past year would have been easier with a furry companion. In any event, if you find yourself thinking about another pup, give yourself full permission to do so; that's my opinion.
Again, I offer understanding, sympathy and--well, I have been there. Be as kind to yourself as you can, whatever that means--extra cups of tea, a massage, nights out with friends, whatever helps.
However, honestly, this reminds me that I had to retreat from much company for awhile, because I was just not able to be around people that did not understand. I went back to my book group after three months, and the first thing that happened was that someone asked me what my dog's last illness was. When I said "brain tumor," the women in the group began a discussion about how common brain tumors were becoming in the human population, almost like a clinical discussion of the phenomenon. It was awful--I left early and avoided the group after that. They weren't dog people, so they didn't really understand how much I was suffering.
Anyway, please know that I do understand and care. Hugs--