I can't fight this anymore. - Page 2 - Golden Retrievers : Golden Retriever Dog Forums
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post #11 of 24 (permalink) Old 11-10-2012, 01:30 PM
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"We will never be the same as we were before the loss. but we are ever so much better for having had something so great to lose."

I have been right where you are and it isn't fun, I know. So many of us seem so determined to cling to our grief for some reason, maybe we feel that's all we have left of them. But that's not true, they are always in our hearts and memories. It just takes time. I hope this will start to soften for you soon. You girls can help you, if you let them.

“You can shed tears that she is gone,
or you can smile because she has lived.

Love is patient, love is kind.
Love never gives up or loses faith.
Love is always hopeful and endures through every trial.

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post #12 of 24 (permalink) Old 11-10-2012, 01:36 PM
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There is a man of sorrows who has felt what have felt and is hurting with you. I sympathize and offer my support, but the man of sorrows sympathizes and supports you more. His name is Jesus. He wishes you to comfort you in your sorrows if you will let him.

Eldorado's-Fawnboro Super Glorious Miracle CGCA TDInc

Birthdate: February 5th 2012

Gotcha Day: March 30th 2012

Mercy's on
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post #13 of 24 (permalink) Old 11-10-2012, 01:52 PM
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The ones you have will keep you going,they don't know how much you miss the one you lost, they just need you, your love, taking care of them, you will get through this with them.

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post #14 of 24 (permalink) Old 11-10-2012, 03:25 PM
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Thinking of you We lost our little girl Daisy 10 months ago and you've described exactly how we are feeling. I don't know what advice to offer you except just take it a day at a time and try your best to focus on your memories. It's so difficult though all of us that have lost understand your pain. Sending lots of hugs!

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post #15 of 24 (permalink) Old 11-10-2012, 04:17 PM
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I feel your pain! I'm so sorry that you're going thru this very tragic time without your girl. We lost our beloved Max 7/26/12. On many days, your post could be my own. On most days the grief going on without them just seems to be too heavy to bear. Many days, we have to take it one minute at a time. To take on more is just too big of a load. Try not to focus on the future, but getting to the next minute or hour. At some point we do learn how to live without them. That hole in your heart will never be filled. But we do learn to get by with it. As your other kids get older, they will make a space in your big heart of their own.

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post #16 of 24 (permalink) Old 11-10-2012, 05:10 PM
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Being human is not a physical battle it is a mental one.

I know because I also suffer from this but I must force myself to remember that there are so many things that happen on earth that we cannot explain. Our feeble human minds cannot comprehend how we even came to be.

There MUST be more out there that what we can see. That is why so many people believe have faith in a better place far more intelligent and wonderful than what we see here on earth. That is why there are so many organised religions out there with millions of followers.

Why have you decided that Allie is in a bad place?
Doesn't it make more sense that she was sent here for a short time to give you the gift of unconditional love and now she deserves to go back to heaven and rest and enjoy some reward time? Just because she is gone from your sight does not mean that she is gone altogether.

It is only human nature to think the worst. It is an advanced soul (which we are all striving to be) that can stand the test and hold their head up high and have faith in heaven and beyond.

Allie would want you to have faith and focus on the positive relationship that you had together instead of the heart breaking inevitable loss that we all sign up for when we bring a new soul into our lives. She wants you to keep up the fight.

Decide and have faith that she is being looked after and being healed for by those people and pets that have gone before her. Know that earth is the testing ground of faith and that heaven is our real home where we feel the most loved happy and free. Allie deserves this even if it means being away from your sight. Be happy for her.

There will be times when you will feel weak use this energy to help others. Donate some clothes, continue your fantastic work on the forums or help out at the local dog shelter.

You have every right to miss her but when you do do it with pride for the beautiful eternal relationship that you have together. You have sent many waves of love and support to others may you feel the love and waves of support that is being sent to you tenfold!

Good luck with your healing!!! You CAN do it

"Turn your face to the sun and the shadows fall behind you." - by Proverb, Maori.

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post #17 of 24 (permalink) Old 11-10-2012, 05:48 PM
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She's not far away, She's with you even though you can't see her. She's guiding you and with you every day. We are not the same now, that is so true but we are better because of them. Casey taught me so much and now Jessie teaches me like your pups are teaching you. Be kind to yourself, you will see her again.

Cindy, Jessie CGC, Jake Cooper all owned by Samantha
Sweet Casey in spirit

Our Casey, my best friend
12/28/98 to 12/8/10
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post #18 of 24 (permalink) Old 11-10-2012, 09:43 PM
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It does get better, but it takes a lot of time, and a lot of searching. I understand completely the loss. I did not think that I would ever be the same. Time does heal, but it is ALOT of time. When we have loved so deeply to a companion that was with us everyday we need ALOT of time to a new normal. In my experience, I found peace in a couple of videos which I will upload. Yet, if I am honest, my peace really came when I was able to have another golden to love.


Kindest Regards, Patrice

There are some relationships in life that change the way you see the world. If you happen upon them--you will never forget. Buddy 10-5-2003-10-30-2011: My heart dog.
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post #19 of 24 (permalink) Old 11-10-2012, 09:54 PM
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I read some article...

Locking away grief doesn't make it go away. Express it. Cry, scream, pound the floor, talk it out. Do what helps you the most. Don't try to avoid grief by not thinking about your pet; instead, reminisce about the good times. This will help you understand what your pet's loss actually means to you.
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post #20 of 24 (permalink) Old 11-11-2012, 05:22 AM
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Oh gosh. I came here because I was crying for my Max we lost in July. I try to remember his smell and his face and when I would wipe his eyes. This is the best place to come to.

All I can muster out is, we are here for you. Everyday. If you need to post every 30 minutes..we are here for you. It's so hard. I'm so sorry.

I do have to say that when Max passed, someone sent me the following poem and it helped. As I cried right through it, it helped. It helped my husband more.

A big huge hug to you. I'm so sorry. It's been 4 months and I still hate going down to the kitchen by myself. I still talk to him and cry for him to wake up and come "get it".

But, what I have learned, I have support here. Come here. We are here to listen.... this poem helped us more then goldensmum even knows....

Originally Posted by goldensmum View Post
If only we could wave a magic wand and it would take away our hurt and pain at having had to let our much loved ones go - but then it may also take away our happy memories of our lives together and that would hurt just as much.

There is no easy solution, personally I don;t think it ever gets easier, but we learn in time to cope with the hurt a little bit better.

Mom, please don't mourn for me
I'm still here, though you don't see.
I'm right by your side each night and day
and within your heart I long to stay.

My body is gone but I'm always near.
I'm everything you feel, see or hear.
My spirit is free, but I'll never depart
as long as you keep me alive in your heart.

I'll never wander out of your sight-
I'm the brightest star on a summer night.
I'll never be beyond your reach-
I'm the warm moist sand when you're at the beach.

I'm the colourful leaves when fall comes around
and the pure white snow that blankets the ground.
I'm the beautiful flowers of which you're so fond,
The clear cool water in a quiet pond.

I'm the first bright blossom you'll see in the spring,
The first warm raindrop that April will bring.
I'm the first ray of light when the sun starts to shine,
and you'll see that the face in the moon is mine.

When you start thinking there's no one to love you,
you can talk to me through the Lord above you.
I'll whisper my answer through the leaves on the trees,
and you'll feel my presence in the soft summer breeze.

I'm the hot salty tears that flow when you weep
and the beautiful dreams that come while you sleep.
I'm the smile you see on a baby's face.
Just look for me, Mom, I'm everyplace!
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