Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Westminster, MD
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Having trouble bonding
I guess I should give a little bit of back story for this post before asking for suggestions. Then you'll know where I'm coming from.
In May of this year, I very abruptly lost my heart and soul, my heart dog, Jake, to cancer at age 7. He was found to have a large lump on the top of his head, which seemed to appear overnight, in March. After testing for other things, and not responding to various treatments, an aspirate of the area was taken and sent out for histology. It came back as sarcoma. This was the end of April and from there he went downhill very quickly and we had to put him to sleep on May 19th, two days after his 7th birthday. My husband took the news very hard, as did my MIL, which forced me to be the strong one through this whole thing even though I was completely heartbroken and devastated. An extremely hard task for me, since Jake was my baby. My son. He was a 1st wedding anniversary gift to me from my husband, and in my eyes, was the absolute perfect golden. I am sobbing as I write this, if that gives any indication to my attachment to him. I still cannot go a day without shedding some tears over him.
My husband, quickly, wanted another dog. I really just wanted to cope with my loss and take things slow, but I gave in. We got Brooks in July. I am having a really difficult time bonding with him. He follows me around and it appears that he has decided that he, like Jake, will be my boy, but I don't have strong feelings about him yet. He's sweet, and I love him, but I don't 'feel' for him yet. Does that make sense? My husband adores him, but I feel myself holding back and I can't seem to let go. Has anyone else dealt with this? How did you cope? I don't know what to do to get to 'that point' with Brooks. I also don't feel as though I have as much patience with him as I did with Jake, and that's not really fair to Brooks. I am going to put Brooks and I in an obedience class, which I'm hoping will help, but the classes in our area don't start back up until early spring because of the weather (most are outdoors).
Any suggestions would be welcome.
Kisamore Gold Gloves Brooks