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Picking a Puppy Vent

3K views 29 replies 23 participants last post by  Beanie 
#1 ·
I have a wonderful litter picked out and deposit is down. I am VERY happy with my pick. All Clearances - great backgrounds - I did my homework.

BUT I hesitate to tell people my pick because it seems everyone has an opinion and second guesses every decision.

You can't tell your rescue friends you are going to a breeder! Heaven forbid!

But you also get grief from your Golden friends who are sure they know of a 'better' litter for you. Really - did you have a gazillion emails with the breeder? Do you even know these dogs?

Oh well - I guess this all comes with the territory. I really don't care as I'm happy but geez can't others just be happy for you too?

Sorry to vent and thanks for listening.
 
#2 ·
You can't tell your rescue friends you are going to a breeder!
Congrats on your new pup! I've been guilty of the above, my good friend & die hard rescue advocate purchased a pup--but thanks to her, I was able to put hands on what a well-bred golden is (and should be). And due to the golden's breeding, she had a rock solid dog that serves as a great support for rescues passing through her house.
 
#5 ·
A dog is the only family member that you truly get to chose. If you are happy with your choice, that is all that matters!! Your friends should be happy for you and if they are not, then they really aren't your friends.

We all have different things we are looking for in a puppy and a breeder. All the best with your new family member!! :)
 
#16 ·
A dog is the only family member that you truly get to chose. If you are happy with your choice, that is all that matters!!

I agree - I pick what I like. You pick what you like and I dont complain and it will be a life committment to my own golden :)
 
#6 ·
Welcome to the politics of the dog world! If you can, follow the advise listed above. You did your homework, you are comfortable with your breeder and the temperment/looks of the parents then go forward. It is a shame that people feel they need to tell you something different instead of just sharing in your joy. Try to close your ears to them and know in your heart you did the right thing for you and your family. You did good!

There will always be the "favorite" kennel, the dog of the month and people will always want to associate with them. It is normal to want to be with the more IN dogs/kennel. It will change the next year, the next champion, the next move to what the public thinks they want. Again, you did right. Be excited with your choice and show us pictures when you get them.

We are Happy for you!
 
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#7 ·
People give me grief over the dogs i get period, rescue or not, if I couldn't handle them or afford them I wouldn't get them. I Just ignore their comments (and these come from my own parents) because it doesn't affect them.
 
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#9 ·
You know to be truely fair many of my friends are very happy for me. There are just always a select few that just always think they know better. It just irritates me I guess. I struggle to know the right comeback remark....any good ones out there I can use? :)
 
#10 ·
I would just say "Thank you (with a sarcastic emphasis added to the thank you if you want) for your opinion, but I could not be happier with the puppy I (emphasis added on the I if you want) chose."
 
#12 ·
You are lucky you can delete the e-mails you can hang up the phone and you can walk away from those that are doubting you. I had this trouble with myself. I am a die hard rescue person but I wanted a dog that I could compete in hunt with. Yes I could have went with a spayed/neuterd rescue but I wanted to buy a dog from a breeder that produced what I was looking for. My mind said one things my heart said another. I debated with myself for along time. I wondered what my mom would have thought of me doing this she did rescue her whole life. Oh man I still wonder if she would be happy for me. I still wonder if I did the right thing.
So if you are happy that is all that matters.
 
#14 ·
Megora - you are right and that is what I will do. But in your mind sometimes you just want that comeback so at least you can say it to yourself. LOL

General V - if you did the right thing and made sure your pup came from a reputable place then I'm sure your Mom is happy. I too wrestled with getting a rescue last time as my dogs before were all rescues. But after many health issues with my rescue Golden I wanted one that I knew had a good background to start him off. Besides in my part of the country Goldens last about 60 seconds at a rescue as I did try!
 
#18 ·
You need to do what is right for you. I come from a long, long line of rescues - usually GSD dogs or crosses. You know when a dog dies, you go to the local shelter or pound and offer a new dog a home.

Then I went to goldens. First from pet stores, then from breeders and 2 of my current goldens were returned to their breeder (Towhee & Brady). Are they rescues? Are they rehomes? In the end, it doesn't matter. They are the dogs in my life and they are the dogs choosen for me by a power who really doesn't make mistakes and they are dogs that I love.

I really get tired of people who say 'Have you considered rescue?' or in other ways trying to inject their values into my life. You have chosen your dog (or your dog has been chosen for you) and you will do your very best for that dog :)
 
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#19 ·
When picking out a puppy, it is a lot like picking out a wife/husband. Everybody sees something different and special in the person or puppy they have chosen. As long as you are happy, that is all that matters.

I do know when I brought Brady home, I did go through a long bout of guilt that I did not rescue. I was almost embarrassed to bring him out in public because he was so beautiful and perfect.

I have rescued in the past and even after Brady, but I have also bought from breeders. I realize now that every situation is different, and rescuing isn't always the right choice for every situation.
 
#20 ·
The only time I feel somewhat embarrassed is when people look at Bertie and then ask me how much I spent for him.

Considering Bertie was a show pick puppy, has full registration, and has a stacked pedigree (every single dog behind him is a champion)... it's a miracle that he was only $1200. The first time I was talking on the phone with the breeder I was tensing up as she was talking up the litter. To put this in context, Jacks breeder was offering $1300 puppies for "pet bred" puppies and I'd been seriously dwelling on going back to the same breeder since Jacks was so easy to raise...

But when you talk to people who have never spent more than $200, if that, on a dog, it can be very uncomfortable or difficult explaining why you spent that much on a dog.

This when you'd never be expected to explain why you spent nearly $3000 on a computer gaming system. Or something useless and stupid like that. :)
 
#22 ·
I understand this all to well. My best friend was told that she "obviously" couldn't care for her one dog, why was she getting another" while the truth was far from it. And it hurts.

When my DH and I started our hunt, we were told by quite a few friends that we shouldn't get a large breed because put house is too small. Or we needed to wait until our backyard was pristine to get a puppy because they'll just ruin it. Or we wouldn't have time for a dog. Then when we got him, all that seemed to stop. Im sure a few still whisper behind out backs. But it doesn't matter. Cause we have the perfect dog for us. Small house or not. Lol

Having been in your shoes, just calmly stand up for yourself. Let the naysayers know that while you hear them, their opinion is of no consequence in this matter. I've even resorted to reminding people if they dont have something nice to say, then they better keep their mouth shut.


Sent from my iPhone using Petguide.com Free App
 
#24 ·
My heart goes out for those that get rescues. There are many stories of the good that has come to abandoned or abused dogs. Kye is a perfect example.

But, and this is the riskiest thing I have ever said on this forum: I get sick and tired of some certain rescuers who shame me for going to a breeder. There is a minority that really gets off on their sanctimonious, self-righteous bandwagon.

I suppose that is the way of the world. Sorry for the rant. I will try to do better next time.
 
#26 ·
My stock answer to people is that "In my opinion there are 3 legitimate places to get a dog, a reputable breeder, a shelter and a rescue. We went with a reputable breeder." We also compete with our dogs so it's a bit simpler to explain, but that generally shuts people up.

And that's just rude if someone asks you what you paid. Answer with "it was well within our budget" and leave it at that.
 
#27 ·
I have found that envy is the root of some of these kinds of comments. Without knowing your friends, perhaps they wanted puppies themselves but were unable for various reasons to get ones from reputable breeders. Also some people are not content with their own good deeds but feel the need to tell other people how to carry out their lives too.

The truth of the matter is that no dog, puppy, adult or rescue is right for every family all of the time and we make the decisions that are right for us at the time. Oddly people make these same kinds of comments to people that have 4 + children at home ( this was God's plan for us works in this circumstance as well.)

It is tiring when other people think they know how you should and shouldn't spend your money. We are planning a puppy for our family too and I have had people ask me why don't you go to a rescue or a shelter and my reply is because I want a puppy who will grow up with our children. Most people seem to understand this.

Enjoy your puppy without guilt. You have earned the pleasure the dog will bring you and your family.
 
#29 ·
Oh I completely understand what you are going through. A couple of my best friends are vehement rescue workers and we tried so hard to find a golden puppy through rescues and just couldn't. Heck I was looking all over the US at various different rescues. They finally reluctantly acknowledged that going with a breeder was the only way to find a young pup and they understood why I was so insistent on a puppy.

When you find the right breeder, go with it. Listen to your gut and don't be so enthusiastic about getting a puppy that you ignore your gut feeling. You will know when you find the right match.

Regardless of whether you get from a rescue or a breeder, look into pet insurance. I got my first golden from a breeder with terrific lines and clearances but Mazlon still ended up with hip displeasia ... so problems can present themselves regardless of the puppy's background.

Good luck and I look forward to seeing the pics of your new baby!!!
 
#30 ·
When I got my girl (she is now 3) I was working with a rescue. I helped place lots of dogs but I wanted a Golden. I looked and looked through the rescue world for a Golden but no puppies ever came in. The local Golden rescue wouldn't consider us because of our fencing.

So I asked friends for a good Breeder referral and ended up getting way involved with showing and a whole new group of friends. Unfortunately there were some of the over-zealous rescue people in the group I worked with who gave me grief - and I just blocked them on FB and left the rescue. I volunteered my time elsewhere.
 
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