Some people... - Golden Retrievers : Golden Retriever Dog Forums

GoldenRetrieverForum.com is the premier Golden Retriever Dog Forum on the internet. Registered Users do not see the above ads.
Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1 (permalink)  
Old 12-31-2012, 01:22 PM
Kristen; Buddy's Human
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 525
Thanks: 138
Thanked 251 Times in 173 Posts
Some people...

This is more of a rant than anything, just had to get it off my chest.

A work friend of mine is having her baby and asked me to petsit for her while she's in the hospital. I said sure, no prob. A little background here: the puppy she has is actually one from a rescue I worked with for a while. I fostered the puppy for a week and that week turned into two because she got Parvo. While I had her, my friend fell in love with her and decided afterwards she couldn't stand to let the pup go back to the organization.

Now, I tried to talk her out of it. She was about four months pregnant at the time and still adjusting to the idea of being a single mother, the last thing she needed was a three-month old puppy to train. But she insisted, and at the end of the day I couldn't stop her from adopting the puppy.

Well, that cute little 8-pound puppy is now 8 months old and about 40 pounds of wriggly, nervous energy...that isn't housetrained at all, has absolutely no obedience training (seriously, I taught the dog "sit" and "spin" and this chick now thinks I'm freaking Cesar Milan or something), and has no leash training. Almost weekly I'm updated about the dog chewing up or destroying something new and every time she says that she's going to get rid of the dog.

((I would take her myself and try to re-home her, but my husband says I can't and we're noticing Buddy having a weird reaction to her. Honestly the couple of days we have her for are pushing it because Buddy is rather upset right now that there's a strange dog in his house with his people.))

Every time I mention gently that she should find a friend or something that can give this dog a new home, she just breaks down crying that she loves the dog so so much and she could never give her up...yet I can't count the number of times I've heard her say she can't handle Brandy (the puppy) anymore and she has to go. To her credit, the dog is well fed, lives indoors and is loved and she gets daily walks (maybe not long ones, but daily). The only thing I can really get upset about is she hasn't fixed the dog yet because she says it costs too much, but I pointed out the SNAP program in this area to her and she said she'd do that.

It finally dawned on me last night after picking this dog up from her place that she'll never get rid of this dog. She's going to complain forever that this dog is so wild and such a demon and such a bad dog but she'll never give her the training she so desperately wants. That's what kills me - this dog really wants to be trained! She is so eager to learn! It only took me ten minutes to teach her sit and stay two weeks ago and she still remembers the commands even though I know her owner is not consistent with using them.

The best I can do is try to get her somewhat housebroken and trained for the couple of days she's with me. It just breaks my heart because I feel like I've failed this dog. Sure, she got a forever home, but she didn't get the best one. She really is a great dog with good heart and such a quick learner that training her would be a breeze, but because my colleague isn't putting in the effort to train her she's just labeled as a "bad dog" and ignored. Had I never let this girl see this sick little puppy she would have had a better chance at a home with kids that would run around and play with her and adults that would train her to be the great dog she is.
__________________



“Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, it's at the end of your arm. As you get older, remember you have another hand: The first is to help yourself, the second is to help others.” (Audrey Hepburn)
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
  #2 (permalink)  
Old 12-31-2012, 01:58 PM
Brave's Avatar
Jen
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Southern California
Posts: 6,165
Thanks: 3,455
Thanked 7,803 Times in 3,537 Posts
Since she's from a rescue, could you discreetly inquire with the rescue for a follow-up home visit? Anonymously of course.

Other than that - perhaps it's time for a genuine heart to heart with the owner. I don't mind some venting here and there but at some point the owner either has to go or get off the pot. Ya know?

I cannot imagine the frustration your experiencing.


Sent from my iPhone using Petguide.com Free App
__________________
Hecate Hellhound Bearer of Mischief - "Bear" - 8/2012 -

Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
  #3 (permalink)  
Old 12-31-2012, 02:02 PM
Mayve's Avatar
Love walks on four paws
 
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 2,851
Images: 1
Thanks: 3,974
Thanked 3,415 Times in 1,766 Posts
This makes me worried for when that baby gets home....Not that the dog would hurt the baby, but that your "friend" will decide that it's to much and dump the dog...I hope I'm wrong, well kind of, I hate to see dogs put out, but might be the best to re-home it for the dog!!!!
__________________


Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
  #4 (permalink)  
Old 12-31-2012, 02:13 PM
Kristen; Buddy's Human
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 525
Thanks: 138
Thanked 251 Times in 173 Posts
I keep saying what you two are saying to my husband - "what if Brandy "ran off" and we got her a new home?"

He says it's not my dog, no matter how attached I am to her, and I can't do that. It's just barely this side of legal and we would be heartbroken if someone did that to us. His point is it's not our place to judge and "play God" in a way because we don't think it's a good situation. He makes good points, but I still feel like I've given this poor pup a worse life than she deserves

The other issue, like I mentioned previously, is we've noticed lately Buddy is getting a little overprotective of me and was getting snappy at this puppy because she was jumping on me. He did this once before at the dog park when another dog jumped on me so it's not an isolated thing and we are working on it, but I'd rather not risk hurting this sweetie while doing it. So us keeping her for an extended period of time is out of the question.

I'm scared of the same thing you are Mayve; this dog is a sweetheart but she can be exuberant and is totally high-energy and the first time she jumps up on the baby and accidentally scratches it...
__________________



“Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, it's at the end of your arm. As you get older, remember you have another hand: The first is to help yourself, the second is to help others.” (Audrey Hepburn)

Last edited by LilBitBit; 12-31-2012 at 02:19 PM. Reason: clarification, spelling
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
  #5 (permalink)  
Old 12-31-2012, 02:14 PM
Brave's Avatar
Jen
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Southern California
Posts: 6,165
Thanks: 3,455
Thanked 7,803 Times in 3,537 Posts
Exactly! If she can't deal with the dog pre-baby, I hope she understands what to expect post-baby. The dog has no training, so I worry about her caging the dog 24/7 to avoid the issue.

It's hard for me to hear this story, tbh.

I have an upcoming surgery where I won't be able to talk for a month. So we're working relentlessly on getting as many commands as possible learnt with just a hand signal from many different angles. Because I would hate to have to crate Bear while I'm recovering simply because I didn't do my own due diligence in prepping for the situation.



I hope for the best for the puppy.


Sent from my iPhone using Petguide.com Free App
__________________
Hecate Hellhound Bearer of Mischief - "Bear" - 8/2012 -

Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
  #6 (permalink)  
Old 12-31-2012, 02:24 PM
Kristen; Buddy's Human
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 525
Thanks: 138
Thanked 251 Times in 173 Posts
She doesn't crate; the dog has a baby gate so she's in the kitchen and has free rein in there. The dog hates crates, I tried introducing her to one last time I had her for a day and she seriously freaked out.

I don't know if her being in the kitchen is any better though because it's kinda like her "cage"; she goes to the restroom inside (she's somewhat pad-trained) on the floor and isn't let out into the main of the house that much because she was destroying the carpet. This girl's housing doesn't allow dogs (another BIG issue I warned her about and tried to use to convince her not to get the dog) so she doesn't get to go outside just to play besides her walks, which are always at night/early early morning and not around other dogs so it's a wonder she's socialized at all.
__________________



“Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, it's at the end of your arm. As you get older, remember you have another hand: The first is to help yourself, the second is to help others.” (Audrey Hepburn)
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
  #7 (permalink)  
Old 12-31-2012, 05:49 PM
Phillyfisher's Avatar
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 3,221
Thanks: 1,292
Thanked 1,344 Times in 626 Posts
Can you find the time to take the dog once a week and work on training her for your friend? Perhaps the training would give the pup some confidence, and perhaps lessen the tension between her and Buddy. I know our Tucker isn't fond nervous dogs either. Even just a little bit of training for this pup could make a world of difference in her life.
__________________


Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Phillyfisher For This Useful Post:
LilBitBit (01-02-2013)
  #8 (permalink)  
Old 01-02-2013, 10:18 AM
Kristen; Buddy's Human
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 525
Thanks: 138
Thanked 251 Times in 173 Posts
My husband and I were working on it slowly yesterday - we had an epiphany and realized that us holding Buddy back and acting so scared of an attack was just making things worse. Buddy's never had a dog that jumps and dances to signal play around him before, so he's just having to learn that she isn't trying to attack him. She is a nervous little thing too which I'm sure doesn't help but it's mostly that she was jumping at him.

Philly, I'm thinking of doing that; my husband isn't thrilled with the current situation but I think he'd be a lot happier once we get Buddy and her playing well together. There's also the issue of both of them still being intact, but Buddy is getting fixed asap anyways.

UPDATED TO ADD:
I was very very upset over the period of this original posting, but am doing better now. I forgot how absolutely frustrating it is to have a puppy and to have to housebreak and start from ground zero again when I just finished that with Buddy! We're working on it though. She's had a couple accidents while at my house but knows I expect her to go out and is starting to signal to me by going to the door when she's ready. I've also got her not jumping anymore when we go say hi to her; she's so funny, she'll try to jump then walk away and either sit or lay down and wait for attention because she knows I won't say hi while she's jumping. I know that's a huge thing for her owner so I'm glad it's working well so far.

She and Buddy are...getting there. We've been introducing them slowly, maybe three or four times a day, not holding onto either of them but in the room and as soon as Buddy growls or barks introduction time is over. Last night they were together for five minutes without incident so I'm optimistic.

The biggest problem I'm having is keeping her occupied. With two other dogs and one still unsure about her she does end up spending time alone and so far has shown no interest in any of the toys I've tried to entice her with. I tried a rope, a squeaky toy, a treat ball...she's very good at wrestling but I don't know if she really knows how to play with a real toy. She also turns her nose up at any treats I offer her so there's no hope of giving her like a rawhide or an antler.
__________________



“Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, it's at the end of your arm. As you get older, remember you have another hand: The first is to help yourself, the second is to help others.” (Audrey Hepburn)

Last edited by LilBitBit; 01-02-2013 at 03:08 PM. Reason: Updating
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
  #9 (permalink)  
Old 01-04-2013, 05:33 PM
Kristen; Buddy's Human
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 525
Thanks: 138
Thanked 251 Times in 173 Posts
Updates on Brandy:
My friend isn't out of the hospital yet :/ Or she is and hasn't called me, and while part of me says that's taking advantage the other part doesn't want to rush a new mother. I'm going to start bothering her on Sunday if I don't hear from her before then because that makes a week we've had her pup.

Brandy's doing better at playing well with my boys and my boys are acting better around her. She's doing better at going outside as well, which I'm proud of. She hardly jumps up anymore, and has learned to lay down or sit and stay in that position for affection.

The worst thing is the barking! Because we're still not 100% with her and Buddy yet, we're keeping them separate, and she howls and barks like none other. I know that going to her reinforces it, so we're trying not to, or using a squirt bottle and giving her a firm NO and a splash of water when she's barking. But nothing works and it's driving me insane.
__________________



“Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, it's at the end of your arm. As you get older, remember you have another hand: The first is to help yourself, the second is to help others.” (Audrey Hepburn)
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
  #10 (permalink)  
Old 01-04-2013, 06:13 PM
lgnutah's Avatar
Supreme Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: South Carolina
Posts: 7,342
Images: 4
Thanks: 395
Thanked 1,467 Times in 908 Posts
Your friend just had a baby, is overwhelmed with adjusting to that (she is up every 2-4 hours at night, and feeds the baby, cares for it all day). She has no extra anything to give to the puppy and probably is just hoping you will keep her a few weeks.....
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to lgnutah For This Useful Post:
Sally's Mom (01-15-2013)
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 10:51 AM.



Powered by vBulletin® Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Content Relevant URLs by vBSEO 3.5.2
© Golden Retriever Forum .com
PetGuide.com
Basset.net DobermanTalk.com GoldenRetrieverForum.com OurBeagleWorld.com
BoxerForums.com DogForums.com GoPitbull.com PoodleForum.com
BulldogBreeds.com FishForums.com HavaneseForum.com SpoiledMaltese.com
CatForum.com GermanShepherds.com Labradoodle-dogs.net YorkieForum.com
Chihuahua-People.com RetrieverBreeds.com

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65