Join Date: Jun 2010
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I think kindness should not be random, even while charity (giving money) should be a bit more measured and careful.
People do get embarrassed when given randomly given charity. One example I can think of was a woman at my church who saw me give up my seat to somebody else, even though it meant instead of kneeling on a cushioned kneeler, I knelt on hard tile. I was 8 or 9 at the time and didn't really think much of it. If my parents told me to give up my seat and move, I moved.
The woman found my parents and went out of her way to compliment me to them. That was very nice and all she needed to do. But then she gave us toys, clothes and money through one of our ushers not long after. She did this anonymously, so my parents couldn't gently refuse and direct her to give to others who actually needed things.
And she became extremely upset when my parents asked the usher to give everything to another family who had more children and were worse off then us. It somewhat put that woman and my family in a pretty awkward position - my parents were embarrassed about being given charity like that, and the woman was embarrassed when she found out the charity had been deflected. That's an extreme case, but in general - when people give money and goods out to people who aren't asking for help, it does cause awkwardness.
I think everyone should genuinely strive to be decent, warm, thoughtful and considerate of everyone around them. And there are a LOT of awesome people out there who are genuinely nice.
There are people out there who apparently were raised by pigs or something and OMG... good example is my sister goes to stand outside of the coffee shop every morning waiting for them to open. There usually are a handful of other people waiting as well. One woman in particular was cussing out the workers for not moving fast enough. This woman was young and well-dressed and appeared fairly well-off. It was my sister and an old guy standing there waiting as well and listening to this terrible woman yapping away. The old guy finally made a comment about her language, and the woman proceeded to be verbally abusive towards this man, including sexual and age related insults. My sister finally stepped in between the other woman and the man and told the woman to step off or she was calling police.
There are people like that woman out there, but thankfully I think they are outnumbered 10 to 1 by decent and GOOD people.