Golden Retriever Dog Forums banner

Returning puppy to breeder

13K views 23 replies 16 participants last post by  Shalva 
#1 ·
Sadly one of the pups from my golden only puppy class looks like he is going back to the breeder. He is 6 months old, crate trained, obedience trained, and has had some hunt training. The owner is just overwhelmed with having a puppy. She is not into exercise or the activity level of a young golden. All of her previous goldens were older rescues, this is her very first puppy. I think she really wants a couch potato dog that will hang out with her. Her goal was having a therapy dog she could take to the hospital and nursing homes.

Anyone else run I to this? I will see her and the pup at our puppy class on Saturday. My theory is that she should give the pup up now instead of dragging it out and making it more painful for herself. I'm looking for advice from anyone that has gotten a pup back or who has given a pup up. I want to say the right thing to this person and not upset her, but encourage her to give up the pup.
 
#3 ·
Aww that's too bad for the puppy! We've had bumpy patches with Bentley but I would never give him up. Plus, now that he's over 5 months old we seem to have developed a rhythm and I know whatever lies ahead we will be able to handle it.
I hope the breeder can find it a good home, it's not the puppies fault.
 
#4 ·
He's a typical puppy with energy to burn. Her problem is, she doesn't exercise him enough. She feels he is unmanageable when he is out of his crate. I've been around him and he's a great dog, he just needs more time getting out. It's just not a good fit for her lifestyle. I've been encouraging her to be patient.
 
#6 ·
I agree with Max's Dad. Did the owner ask you for advice/express to you that she is thinking about returning the puppy?

I am not sure what kind of relationship you have with the owner, but my best friend re-homed her puppy. Before she did it, she came to me for advice. I honestly told her I thought it would be in the puppy's best interest if she re-homed him (for reasons I will not go into). But, like I said, she is my best friend and she comes to me for advice because she knows I will be 100% honest with her. Plus, she already knew in her heart the right thing to do.

If the owner of the pup truly knows what is best for him, she will (hopefully) make the right decision without any encouragement.
 
#7 ·
Our puppy group has worked to help her with her pup. She has told me she is thinking about it. She is having lunch with our trainer tomorrow to discuss options. Our trainer is a long time owner-breeder-trainer of goldens. The trainer has great insight into the breed. Our breeder will be in town next Friday, I'm sure a conversation will happen then. I am sad for the breeder and the owner.
 
#9 ·
If the owner is not invested in exercising the dog (which is a shame) there are alternatives. Hire a dog walker. Send the pup to doggie day care. Schedule play dates with neighbor or friend's pups, etc. If she doesn't want to leave her couch then I find fetch to an exhilarating exercise plus training opportunity. Oh and the bond we build!

You can even tell her about the forum. We're very supportive and encouraging. Sometimes all you need to do is vent.

I don't think you should suggest returning the dog. You can offer her your ear and shoulder, but unless you know this person deeply, I personally would keep my opinions to myself. It's a subject with too much emotion and pressure to open on someone you don't know deeply or well.


Sent from my iPhone using Petguide.com Free App
 
#11 ·
We too had only adopted older dogs and we were not prepared for some of Tayla's issues with biting and many other things. My husband would have given her up many times, but I'm stubborn. Two weeks before her first birthday she stopped the hand biting and has gotten much better. She is still exhubirant but she is not even 14 months old. I think by 2 she will be fantastic. Time "heels" all things.


Sent from my iPhone using Petguide.com Free App
 
  • Like
Reactions: Jessie'sGirl
#12 ·
At six months old, she has almost gone through the worst of it. I would not encourage her to give him up yet. I saw a BIG change in Brady when he hit 7 - 8 months, almost to the point that I almost took him to the vets to see if he was sick. It just seemed to happen overnight.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Mac'sdad
#13 ·
Young dogs don't exercise or train themselves. Does she have a fenced in yard? While a dog won't exercise himself in the yard, she will be able to throw ball for him, etc. If she can't get him out to truly exercise him, this is better than nothing. I feel for her, but he should have known better that each dog is different and comparing a young dog to their elderly last dog is a big difference. I hope that she ups the training and it can all work out.
 
#14 ·
I have to strongly urge you to encourage your friend to return the pup. I used to feel no puppy should ever be returned but now feel each pup deserves the very best and some people just cannot offer that.

My Towhee was returned to her breeder at about 8 months for being 'too much dog' and my Brady was returned at 10 weeks for 'house breaking problems'.

In both cases they are now happy, balanced dogs who just needed structure, training and love. Which they deserve and I am now grateful they were returned before permanent damage was done. I am co-breeder for Brady, btw and as such am doubly grateful he was returned when his original owners just found it too overwhelming.
 
#15 ·
A 7-8 mos. old puppy is going to start chewing and being more destructive as the adult teeth need to set.

As a breeder I would be happy to take a puppy back from a home that just is overwhelmed and can't handle the puppy ... at six months old finding a home will be easy, the pup is still young and will settle in easily to new routine. The breeder may also know of someone looking for a younger dog that is already trained. If this were my puppy I would want the pup back... and I would refund her money minus expenses once I was able to place the pup in a home...

I think it would be very difficult for me to watch a puppy of mine that was not getting what it needed. I personally would want the pup back and I think that most reputable breeders would. Sometimes it just doesn't work out... and that is nobody's fault it happens. I am not one to try and convince someone to keep a puppy they can't handle... I think that is a big mistake. If someone has gotten to where they are seriously considering giving up their dog then they have likely spent hours and midnights thinking about it and when it gets to the point that they are verbalizing it... then that tells me that the pup would be best off back wth the breeder ...
 
#16 ·
I wish I was closer to you. I would gladly take in the pup. Brooks would love to have a playmate! I hope things work out best for everyone. It's a sad situation for all involved. I just couldn't imagine giving up on a dog. Breaks my heart to even think about it. (And I'm saying this even after Brooks came in covered in mud this morning, and decided what a fun game it would be to jump on the couches :doh: )
 
#17 ·
I have had three returned. One was returned because I would not change the dog from limited to full registration. So she neutered him and returned him... Gorgeous dog, came back very head shy and my friends at Profile Goldens found him a home with one of their clients the next day!!! Much better home. I offered to take this pup back and refund money at ten weeks, because she wouldn't stop complaining about him. He came back at about ten months. Another pup was returned after 1.5 years because of inter bitch fighting within the house. This started at about 8 months. Again, I offered to take her back, then...
Now she lives with GRF member GameBoy. She has successfully lived with two bitches and two boys...all Goldens. Her previous owner was supposed to show her, but didn't and never got her out. She has come a long way. Then my stud fee pup, Basil came back. She is with me to stay. I could have placed her fifty more times as she is the perfect dog to have around. Very calm and gentle... Entered this house with six other Goldens and really didn't impact it. She is very much like her mom, a fireplace dog.

I have to agree with Sunrise. Sometimes the best decision is to understand that this particular pup is not the one for you. Or maybe any pup would be too much.... While my Basil is just like her mom, her puppy, Gabby, is not just like her. Gabby definitely has a lot of piss and vinegar and can be a spitfire... So temperament can be hard to predict based on parentage. As a vet, I see it all of the time. The owner has chosen the wrong pup or the wrong breed for their personality... Heck, I did it when I got Laney and my two boys were under the age of three years... Strong working lines and calm cannot be said in the same sentence. But, I had already,trained one golden for,obedience, I was younger, and I decided to stick with it. She did turn into the most wonderful dog, but it took my OTCH friend to point out her potential to me and it opened my eyes. She had A LOT of training....
And even to the end, she was in constant motion. My husband likened her to a shark...the shark has to keep moving to breathe, well that was my Laney. I got my first golden when she was six months old. She bonded easily to us. So, if your friend has any hesitation, I think that rehoming will help every one.
 
#18 ·
I don't know. I just think of my own experience, many years ago. At about 6 months old, my puppy became so destructive and unmanageable that it was almost unbearable. One day I came home to find that he had destroyed the wood on my dining table, coffee table, bed and deck. It was the "last straw" for me. It wasn't a problem with exercise. He was walked two miles per day, swam in the pool and the Caribbean, and fetched a tennis ball to exhaustion. He was just going through something.

I started talking to people about getting rid of him, returning him to the breeder. I was "test marketing" the idea to see if I could be okay with it. Well, the breeder was thousands of miles away, and not easy to get to (I lived in a remote place at the time, in the tropics, and it was summer when animals could not fly), so I could not make that instant decision.

Fastforward a couple months: the super destruction was never repeated (after I invested in a 55 gal. drum of bitter apple). He started to calm down from the worst of it. I never did return him. And I loved him dearly, I was just at my wit's end with him and didn't know what to do. I didn't want to return him, but I didn't have any other solution. I kept him.

Twelve years later, I was sobbing uncontrollably as I held him while the vet euthanized him, because I absolutely could not bear the loss of my closest companion and heart dog. I had traveled with him, shown him to his championship, swam in the ocean with him, gone through break-ups with him, and lived my every day with him for over a decade. He had been the one constant in my life, and I was his. I'm tearing up even as I remember him, now.

Maybe this lady is just going through the same kind of temporary thing I did. Maybe they can get through it, and this puppy will be her heart dog, becoming an important "person" in her life that she treasures deeply. Maybe she's just test driving the notion of giving the puppy back, and doesn't really want to, just doesn't know what else to do. Maybe she just needs some encouragement to get throught the rough patch. It would have been the biggest mistake ever for me to give my puppy back. But I was ready to, I thought.

Just another experience to consider.
 
#19 ·
I agree with you all. Thank you for your responces. I wish the owner was able to find what she was originally looking for - an older mellow rescue. My husband and I had considered trading our older rescue Hunter for her pup, but Hunter may not like going to a new home. Plus her pup is a litter mate of my girl and sometimes littermates don't always get along well.

It has been a tough Anchorage winter for my friend who doesn't get out much. Until this week we were not above zero in the morning for many weeks. We had 4 hard frosts the first week of September and our first snow mid-September. It's been bitter cold without lots of snow. So if you don't like to get out much already, the weather sure has been a huge deterrent for her.

I think this boy will make someone a very nice hunting or obedience dog. He is quite capable of a JH and WC this coming summer. His personality could put him in a CGC in the summer too. He's just not mellow and may never be. I feel very sorry when a match is not a good fit.

This makes me re-think the responsibility of breeding and the lifetime commitment to their pups that breeders make.
 
#21 · (Edited)
It seems to me that's this lady has done a lot of work with this puppy, so it is sad that she has come to the point where she thinks she has to give him up. I am sure she cannot be considering this lightly, after caring for him for three or more months. I can think of times when my human children got too much for me when they were small & when they were teenagers ....I am sure if I could have given them back, I would have lol. I guess we all have different breaking points, & we all have different levels of energy. At almost 61, both my DH & I are really thankful that our 5.5 months old GR boy is very mellow & not demanding of a great deal of exercise. He does get walked twice a day normally, but we have the opposite to you ....it is so hot here some days & Loki hates walking unless it is relatively cool. So we now often take him for his last walk in the dark. I'm quite a sedentary person, & have really had to step up my activity level a couple of notches, even walking him in light rain when I can see he needs to get out. I hope this lady makes the right decision for both herself & this boy, & if she gives him up, I hope the breeder takes him back & finds a great forever home for him. The lady might live to regret her decision in the future, but in the here & now, it might be the correct thing to do.
 
#22 ·
sounds like another case of unrealistic puppy expectations... sounds like the person did some research about the breed, though usually based on characteristics of an adult dog.... and expected a puppy to behave the same way.

It's a case of perseverance. even if the person rescued an adult Golden and it didn't meet their expectations, they'll back in the same scenario.

I personally would convince her to ride it out for another year, until the puppy is well beyond puppyhood. It look crazy daisy about 2 years for her to calm down at home.
 
#23 ·
Well we are down to the final decision. She has asked everyone's opinion in our classes and the trainers we work with. She has decided her pup is to crazy and wild for her. She is going to give him up on Wednesday to our trainer. The pup is just not getting enough exercise. Yes it is an owner with unrealistic expectations of what it will take to raise a pup. Our trainer is good friends with our breeder, which is where teh pup will head this weekend. He will make someone a very wonderful obedience, rally, agility, or field dog. He's a very well bred pup with lots of possibilities. Now if I could just convince my husband to let us have one more.... 3, 4, 5 what's the difference? He wouldn't notice would he?
 
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top